No matter what you plan, a creative group will verify it anyway — Lean In Circle #1
A conversation between Karolina Hałaszkiewicz and Rita Pater — co-founders of the first IT Women LeanIn Circle in Kraków.
Rita: Karolina — it all started from you, so let’s talk about it first.
Karolina: To be honest it all started with just too many frustrations, and just too many situations when you want to tell your friends and family about your day, but they keep asking “so what is that you do?”. I remember this one discussion I had with friends of friends, over how women obtain senior positions and how men do the same. We were having a pretty solid, well argumented talk, until one girl said “I think women are simply less intelligent”. That was it basically. I was pissed off for a whole week.
“So what is that you do?”
Then there were just too many poor meetups, treated as marketing spots and not knowledge and experience sharing space. Even if there were meetups dedicated to women supporting women in tech -> they turned out to be bizzare gatherings with wine and biscopts and no solid support whatsoever.
I don’t know if you remember this, but I think this was actually you who said to me “Use the anger!”. So I did, and I convinced you to do it with me! ❤
R: Haha, yes! Anger sometimes is a good emotion and I know many amazing initiatives started from it!
I think we both had this dream of being part of a bigger group of women who know the problems and are realistic about the things they need to do every day to achieve their goals. Sometimes it just feels very lonely in this branch, when I’m surrounded mainly by people with a different skill set, with different working area requirements, and often — different priorities and values.
It was Internet Beta last year, when I realised there actually are women who have the same challenges, needs and perspectives I have. I finally didn’t feel like a person who has to explain everything to people and that — I think — was my milestone. I realised I want to be surrounded by such women as Olga Golonka, Anita Kijanka or Katarzyna Marchocka. When we were talking, I felt in my guts — damn’ it — there must be more of us, maybe we just don’t have space for doing things together!
I felt in my guts — damn it — there must be more of us, maybe we just don’t have space for doing things together!
K: Exactly! I’ve heard about LeanIn from various sources, but I never really digged deeper. Until, during Tech Talks Women some girl from Australia told me how she was able to build a supportive and mentoring circle of women in her environment. I looked it up and it turned out that there was not a single circle in Cracow devoted to women in IT! Well here we are!
We started asking around about this need to share the knowledge and experience and to support other girls in tech. It turned out that we were not the only ones struggling. So we’ve spread the good word about this Lean In Circle which we hoped would become a mentoring network.
R: I remember my mix of excitement and anxiety before our kick-off session and you seemed so calm! We organised short talks during Waffle Breakfast Party at u2i. After gathering feedback there it was clear to us all: women need space to talk about more advanced problems, topics and challenges. They are tired of fine meetups full of presentations, they want action points, workshops, other women’s insights and mentoring support.
They are tired of fine meetups full of presentations, they want action points.
It gave us a lot of energy — we felt it was happening for real! We couldn’t say “oh, we are so busy, let’s organize it later” — the women’s stories were appearing on Lean In platform and we knew we want to meet them all and hear their stories.
K: I remember I was so nervous before our first meeting! I was not sure how many girls would actually show up, what would be the energy and enthusiasm and if our plans would work. But there we were, ready to rock it :D
We had more girls there than planned, two crazy productive hours of discussions — it was perfect. We started with a networking part along with goals discovery, every one of us told her story, dreams, passions and what she would like to learn. It was so inspiring and moving, I remember saying to all of you, that after hearing those stories I want to do everything that you want to do.
R: And actually — to me — sharing my goals and telling my story — it was the most difficult part! When you organize meetings you never really have time to sit down, focus and learn from your guests. This time both of us had to be part of the Circle — and to me that was kind of a new thing. Damn, we asked some tough questions! But luckily, we used tools that were just perfect and helped a lot.
K: We used the Skills Matrix tool (usually used for self-organising teams to distribute expertise and diagnose skill set while forming a project team) which we changed a bit. Skills emerged from our stories told before, and the matrix had three levels of expertise, which were later declared by each one of us
‘MORE WOMEN ON STAGE’
R: I was really moved when our goals started appearing on the whiteboard. Some of them were reflections of my own thoughts and goals. One of them was ‘MORE WOMEN ON STAGE’ and to my great surprise — public speaking was one of the skills our group wanted to improve.
Among the skills women wanted to learn and improve we found Product Design, Leadership, Running a Business and other ones. This only shows how women are determined to reach higher and speak louder than they have so far.
K: Obviously we did not manage to do everything on the list, but we’ve already planned next meetings. It’s really amazing how many exceptional, powerful and ambitious women are around us. We should gather up more often and turn it into real action!
R: When I asked you about the things you learnt from the first gathering, you said
“No matter what you plan, a creative group will verify it anyway.” I love that we remember this lesson when we plan the next Lean In Circle meetings.
K: Yes, and for me the most amazing moment was, when we saw that such group support and discussions are a real game changer. We need each other and we’re not afraid to show that we are stronger and better together. I am so happy we created the room, and self-organisation just happened.
