Arjen Robben and the Irony of Perfection
Humans are creatures of habit, it is often said. When faced with a task already done before, we are programmed to repeat the same set of instructions, as we did the last time we encountered it. This, in no way, shows our lack of inquisitiveness. Rather, it tells us that we are programmed to take the tested route; minimizing risk and maximizing utility.
Throwback to the 20th century and the phrase ‘Jack of all trades, Master of none’ would mean an insult. The demanding rigor of the 21st century has rephrased the saying. You need to be a ‘Jack of all trades’ if you stand any chance of toppling your competition.
The same holds true for Football as well. You need to be adept with both feet. You need to have a high defensive work-rate. You need to be fluid, so as to fit into any system. Basically, you need to be tactically indispensable.
Being a one trick pony would make you readable. And in a game of such high stakes, unpredictability often decides the ultimate outcome.
Every footballer aspires to make a name for himself, if not be the best. Cristiano Ronaldo has carved a legacy for himself. He almost guarantees goals every time he sets foot on the pitch. That’s his X-factor.
Lionel Messi mesmerizes with the ball at his feet. He could put you in a dizzying trance, run circles around you all whilst making you look like a complete dunce. He has the ability to pause time as he sets off on his trademark, mazy runs. That’s his USP.
You are at a lack of superlatives to explain the two superstars of our generation, their reverence falls massively short of doing justice to their ability.
Undoubtedly, they are the torchbearers for future footballers. Anything less is simply not good enough.
However, could Ronaldo repeat a 40 yard stunner in the very next game? Could Messi leave 6 defenders chasing shadows twice in the same game? While we continue to speculate if the duo are truly extraterrestrial; we wouldn’t bet on them repeating the feat in such a short time span.
Enter our protagonist, the extremely left footed — Arjen Robben. You probably have a higher chance of watching the Halley’s comet fly-by TWICE, than watching the Dutchman use his right limb. In a world of trademarks, there exists a very unique one in football.
Born in Bedum, the 5'10'’ inch winger began his career at Groningen as a nimble footed, right-sided player.
There just seems to be something about the Dutch style of play that just oozes class. Robben’s technique is heralded as one of the best in World Football. His sumptuous dribbles, delicate flicks and link-up play only speak half as loud as his other, more distinct trait. Nothing screams ‘Arjen Robben’ more than watching the Dutchman steam down the right wing; cut inside on his left foot and curl one into the top corner. The sheer accuracy of the finish and the audacity to execute it over and over again, make it all the more special.
Want some of his best finishes?
Here you go:
Let’s be honest, nothing is perfect. Yet, the closest you can come to perfection is when you manage to pull off your magic trick and awe the audience, even when they’ve seen you do it over and over again.
Talk about your all time favorite Hollywood movie for starters. What keeps you hooked onto it in spite of having watched it umpteen times? Where lies the fun when you know where the movie is heading? That is the beauty, or rather; the irony of perfection.
The whole world knows Robben will run towards the edge of the D, cut inside onto his left foot and caress the ball in the back of the net. Not just us, but the very player tasked with keeping the Dutchman at bay knows the same. Still, the result is inevitable.
Be it our favorite Hollywood movie or an Arjen Robben screamer; we know the plot, we just enjoy watching it unfold, and we do that over and over again.
That, is what perfection reaps: Unanimous and continuous appreciation.
What makes the maneuver even more interesting is that it involves the very basics of Football. A cut inside to your stronger foot is always favorable. A curling effort from your instep may end up in the back of the net, at least 6 times out of 10.
As simple as it may sound, the execution is anything but. It takes years of practice to perfect, and experimental tweaks to make it unplayable. The end result is devastating.
Injuries constantly troubled Robben throughout his mid-years and his attitude was questioned, thanks to some blatant dives. He’s had a few bust-ups with managers and does not like to see his name show up on the substitution board. Beneath all of this, Robben has managed to conjure up and perfect, his lethal weapon. Training tapes from Bayern Munich show the Dutchman practice on his distinctive shooting an hour, each day and in isolation.
Perfectionists are rare, and Arjen Robben is a hidden gem among the few that exist across the globe. Cast aside in his early years, injury ridden in his mid-20’s; the late bloomer has slowly become an indispensable asset for Bayern Munich.
Aged 34, he still looks to have a few good years of service in him, before he finally decides to hang his left boot. In a sport dominated by tricksters and showmen, Arjen Robben has ‘caressed’ his own legacy.
There are only three things in life that are certain:
Death, taxes and an Arjen Robben curler.