Are We Thankful?

11/21/2023

Thanksgiving is for everyone.

Everyone.

I include all Christians, Jews, Muslims, Hindi, Buddhists — from the major religions not mentioned here, to the small free-standing churches who practice in a slightly different way than all the rest, and including the Wiccans, other Pagans, and atheists.

But, but, but, but…. God!!! None of them do it right!!!!

Check yourself before you blow a gasket. Thanksgiving is not about God. Thanksgiving is about gratitude. Thanksgiving is to take yourself out of your grind for one day, and look around at the good things in your life — people, events, and even things, that allow you to both continue on in life, and the things that, even in these hard times, bring you joy. Being grateful is a state of being, not a prayer, though in my home we offer a prayer of Thanksgiving to God because we are grateful for our lives here, and we believe our lives originated with God.

Gratitude is an internal process that — when maintained — can change your entire outlook on life. Thanksgiving is a time when most of us are forced into a timeout to consider that maybe, in the long run, things aren’t so bad — and that, in and of itself, life is good.

That’s easier to do in America than in a lot of places. Most people sitting down to a turkey dinner do not have to worry about where there next meal is coming from, or where they will sleep, or being cold for lack of a coat. We are one of the few places on earth that has fat poor people. Granted, that may mean that their nutrition is not as good as it can be, but I work among the homeless, and even there, I don’t see Ethiopian starvation going on (remember the UNICEF ads?). I’m sure a fair amount of why that is, is that even in the homeless population, there is an effort within that community to help those who are totally wiped out.

Still, it’s hard for a lot of people to sit back and be happy & grateful for even this one day. Many families are living paycheck to paycheck — even families that you would think to be well off. This has been aggravated by so many people getting caught up in the mindset that it’s not enough to keep up with the Joneses, you need to do better than them just to keep even. It is a self-imposed insanity. And uniquely American.

There is a need in the human spirit to feel “safe” — that no disaster waits around the corner, and that everything is going to be okay. That is very hard to do in a time when media breeds division , fear and hatred and doubles down on it with each passing hour.

A day where we gather together, usually with people we have been through some hard times with, should be a shared experience of personal gratitude for each other, and for the times walked through together. Every family has it’s issues — and always have. Arguing sports or the news — or God forbid, religion or politics — has always been the problematic part of sitting down at the same table. Yet, sit down we do, and count our good fortune as the turkey and stuffing get passed around.

Lately though, some families have graduated from the drunk uncle or the grouchy grandpa, to disowning members of their family over affronts to politics, or religion, or the “social order”. I may have a different perspective that many, but I can imagine no “sin” so great that I would disown a family member. That is not to say we all get along great, just that I can’t imagine disowning a single one of them. Sadly, this is not the case in all families. If if this is true in yours, I am sorry that you find yourself in this situation.

Perhaps, in the spirit of gratitude, some bending can happen towards a reconciliation. Unfortunately, this never happens by accident. It must be a deliberate action. If you are the one who issued the disowning, a gentle, genuine invitation back might do the trick. If you are the one disowned, please recognize the difficulty that the other person had in making an offer which conflicts him/her in a deeply personal way. Be gracious, show patience, and if you feel it may not be genuine, ask to share a cup of coffee before the event to either come to an understanding, or maintain things as they are. There is no magic fix, but the “excuse” of a holiday built around gratitude and self-reflection, can provide an opening if the status quo is painful.

There are people who are having a truly bad year, and feel that they have nothing to have gratitude for. I personally have had years like that. That was when other humans, took the form of guardian angels to me, and reached out to include me when they had no need to. The recent widow or widower, the person who you know who lives alone with no family in the area, the family where the main breadwinner is out of work, the people from the last paragraph who feel they have no place to go… show your gratitude by inviting someone “not family” into yours.

But what about God? If you are a believer, do it up with God — we do. If you are not a believer, there is no affront or sacrilege in being grateful to the people or the events or the actions that have put you in a place to be grateful. Gratitude is a “holy” state, but it is not exclusive to people who believe in God, or who believe in God differently that you do.

New Ecclesiastes Ministries champions the concept that “There is but one God, whom we call by many names.” Each individual experiences God in an individual way — some not at all. Gratitude is an immensely healing place to be — for anyone, for any reason. None should be denied because “they aren’t doing it right”.

If we are to enter the larger holiday season with an attitude of gratitude, perhaps that will carry on to a generous mindset as we go to the holiday to celebrate the birth of the guy who taught the loving God and the life of service to others — in a manner that he would actually approve of. Not so much in the commercial manner that we all get lost in, but in a manner that reflects the spirit of Jesus in our charity, kindness and going the extra mile when it would be easier not to. A heart filled with gratitude can do miracles in helping the less fortunate around us.

That is the lesson of Thanksgiving. Gratitude fosters a generous and loving spirit. A generous and loving spirit makes the world a better place. Making the world a better place is good for humanity, and pleases the God you may or may not believe in without placing ridiculous burdens on how or who you can be generous with. It does good for the sake of good, without an agenda.

I wish you a day of gratitude and joy, and love among the bad football and string bean casserole. Let’s carry this for as long as we can.

In Peace, Faith & Love,

Ecc. RL Brandner, New Ecclesiastes Ministries.