tw // overdosing sleeping pills
“Rui,” Renjun patted his thigh for Haechan to sit there as he reached for the wet wipes at his side. “Let’s clean your face, it might irritate you.” Haechan did nothing and sat on Renjun’s lap, the man smiled and took the wet wipes to gently wipe Haechan’s face. “Do you remember your last vacation in Sagada?” the younger man nodded, “I heard everything there.”
“From your darkest secrets and vices,” Haechan remained silent and just listened to Renjun speak in a calm manner as the cold wet wipes touched his face. “You smoke, you drink, you go out at dawn to run away.” Renjun watched Haechan’s face for a moment, “You abused your body, you tried to overdose on sleeping pills, you weren’t the school’s goody good shoes when you’re at your home.”
Haechan took a deep breath and felt his eyes heat up because he knew he was going to cry, “The goody good shoes Blaze can only be seen at school, but the wrecked and messed up Blaze is in front of me.” Renjun gently removed the paint from his forehead, “I was cacamping when you shouted everything you resented in life, I didn’t mean to hear it.”
“Camping?” Renjun nodded, “I love the thrill in my life so I had to do it at least once.” Renjun took new wet wipes and gently touched Haechan’s face, “Ever since I heard all that, I decided to keep an eye on you without you knowing.” Renjun took a deep breath before continuing, “I have to make sure that you’re safe every time na uuwi ka ng bahay n’yo, lagi akong dumadaan sa bahay n’yo to make sure na you’re okay.”
Haechan couldn’t stop his tears from falling, so Renjun smiled slightly and wiped them away. “How did you know that I know?” Haechan just stared at him, “Ikaw yung natapilok sa baba ng pinagaapakan ko noon, you have that two toned hair that’s why I said the hair is familiar to me because it’s yours.” Renjun gave a chortle, “Do you really mean it when you said you hated me?”
Haechan shook his head and slightly lowered his head, “No…” The corner of Renjun’s lips lifted for a moment but it also disappeared when he raised Haechan’s head to wipe the remaining painting off of it. “I was just scared because you might blurt it out to everyone — ”
“I’m not like that, Amore.” Renjun interrupted Haechan’s sentence and took another deep breath again, “I may be the student council president or known as the party goer and have a lot of friends, but I know that what I heard is not my story to tell everyone.” Renjun gently rubbed Haechan’s cheek with his thumb, “It’s your secrets and vices, not mine. I don’t want to put you at risk, Blaze.”
“Your family may hate you for living but for me I don’t.”
