I went out on my bike yesterday in 30 mile an hour winds and pouring rain. I knew I’d spend the next 2 hours cold and wet. So why did I go?

Well I think it’s because I believe that by enduring these conditions, it will somehow make me a better cyclist.

Optimistic. Yes.

But then us humans are a pretty optimistic bunch. So optimistic infact that our views of the future tend to always be irrationally positive.

“Things can only get better” D:ream, 1993.

(Yes I just managed to quote D:ream in a blog post).

We have this wonderful ability to imagine a happier/more successful future version of ourselves and we make decisions based on how we think it will affect future us.

But is this optimism healthy?

Well some would say that the secret to happiness is to lower expectations. If we don’t expect greatness or success, we won’t be disappointed when they never come.

But optimism is inspiring. It keeps us moving forward. We need it to make progress. We imagine an alternate reality because it motivates us. What is life without a goal or ambition?

But what if we achieve these goals? Then what? When I ran the Berlin marathon 2 years ago, I crossed the finish line and felt…nothing. I knew I’d achieved something substantial but, after 6 months of anticipation, I expected some sense of euphoria, a happiness, that just never came.

Which makes me wonder what we crave more: the sense of achievement or actually the desire to achieve.

Is the anticipation more rewarding than the achivement itself?

Think about the smell of fresh coffee or the excitement of gettin a new [insert something you want here], for example. Are we able to distinguish the warm feeling of anticipation from the less satisfying feeling of having?

So…

Well, so what?

For me, I’m trying to understand what I think I want to achieve vs what I actually want to achieve. What I think will make me happy vs what will actually make me happy. I’m trying to decide what I really want.

It’s hard.

In the context of cycling though, the more I think about it, the more I believe that the destination isn’t what’s most important. It’s the ride itself. It’s the people you share it with and the story it means you can tell afterwards, even if it does mean occasionally getting soaked on the way.