Claire, I think you’re confused about something. You think the past is real and bring it into the present where it causes you suffering in the now. This is a mental disease which many suffer from.
Only the now is real. Past and future are fantasies of the mind.
Try writing about the now and it will bring you into the now. Then you can write about love and romance in the now. And people will want to read it.
There is nothing more simple than the now. It’s always here with us in every moment and the experiences of our senses are the proof. Seeing, hearing, feeling, tasting and smelling.
Notice you are in the now right now. And notice that when you are, you’re perfectly happy. Nothing to figure out, no struggle or suffering.
Now write something.