Lessons of Networking from My Gujarati Neighbor
You’ve probably experienced some version of the story I’m about to share. My story is about the now well-known Gujarati-American community, one of the most successful Indian immigrant groups in the U.S. in terms of wealth, entrepreneurship, and business leadership.
When my wife Priya and I first started our lives together in a townhouse, we had a Gujarati family as our neighbors. Over time, they became more than neighbors — they became family friends. Our daughters went to the same school, and we’d take turns picking them up and babysitting them.
When we decided to get our daughters a puppy, both families went to the pet store together. Our daughters and theirs unanimously chose Brownie, a light brown toy poodle bursting with energy. Brownie quickly became a shared joy, running back and forth between our homes and all around the neighborhood with the girls.
Sometime during these close interactions, they started inviting Brownie — and us — to their family gatherings.
And it’s true: once you’re a friend of one Gujarati family, you’re a friend of their entire community. In no time, we found ourselves with new titles — Bhai, Ben, Didi, Kaka, and Kaki. While we gradually shed our inhibitions in using these terms, we often got the genders mixed up. They, however, ignored the errors — out of pure love.
At these gatherings, the men naturally formed small circles, talking mostly about business — motels, gas stations, convenience stores, Dunkin’ Donuts, McDonald’s — you name it. They were always discussing deals: buying, selling, investing, partnering, mentoring — all while sipping masala chai and biting into a Ghughra.
The women quietly tuned into the men’s conversations while enjoying Dhokla and Khakhra with green chutney and ghee and all the time managing the emotional dynamics of the family gatherings. At the right moment, they’d pull aside their sons, husbands, and brothers to offer thoughtful insights and lay down their terms.
Noticing my excitement (and fearing her husband would bring home a Seven-Eleven that night), Priya would stealthily step toward me and whisper, “Robin, control yourself.”
Looking back, I realize that I — a software engineer with no business background — began dreaming about tech ventures in these informal, community-run business incubators. Many failed startups and a few meaningful successes later, I now credit networking as a major force behind my personal and professional growth.
The Origins of Networking
Although networking feels like modern concept, immigrant communities have practiced it for generations — starting businesses, helping each other to find jobs, and offering mutual support. These were the original versions of today’s business incubators or mastermind groups.
In the U.S., networking began to take on a formal shape in the late 1970s and the early 1980s. During this period, chambers of commerce, trade associations, and professional organizations started organizing events encouraging people to meet and connect.
By the 1990s, networking became increasingly centered on career development. Career fairs, corporate events, and alumni gatherings gained popularity. Business schools began teaching students how to network, and it became an essential part of MBA programs.
I remember a computer science classmate who later joined a top business school and launched a successful technology startup. He often said it wasn’t classroom knowledge, but the connections outside the classroom that made it possible.
In the 2000s, platforms like LinkedIn revoltionized digital networking. In Silicon Valley, networking became key to innovation and startup success.
From the 2010s onward, the focus has shifted from who you know to how you connect and bring value. Today, community-based platforms like Meetups, hackathons, and accelerators have taken the lead.
Over the decades, tools and formats of networking have evolved, but the core principles — building trust, exchanging ideas, and helping each other grow — have remained constant.
A Unique Culture of Networking for MEANA
MEANA — the Malayalee Engineers Association in North America — represents engineers and technology professionals of Kerala origin, from universities in India, the U.S., and beyond.
For over 30 years, MEANA has provided a space where Malayalee identity and professional excellence intersect. In the early days, Malayalam was the social language, while English was reserved for professional settings.
Looking ahead, as new generations take stage, English will most likely become the primary language of both spheres — but our core values, family-oriented cultural warmth, and a sense of community will keep us strong.
I envision MEANA as a university — where everyone is both a student and a teacher. People join MEANA for community, connection, and opportunities for growth. Much like a university, MEANA is a venue for learning, exchanging ideas, challenging ourselves, and enjoying fun experiences through friendship, family, the arts, and culture.
We can build a unique and longstanding networking culture within MEANA shaped by our shared heritage, engineering and technology mindset, and strong spirit of mutual support.
To turn this vision into reality, MEANA is launching new networking events to explore topics and feature experts, industry leaders, and public figures as guest speakers and promote up-and-coming MEANA members.
These events will bridge generations — Baby Boomers to Gen Z — allowing older members to share wisdom and experience, and younger members to bring fresh energy and ideas.
This also supports a smooth leadership transition from the Baby Boomers-Gen X to the Millennials-Gen Z generations , keeping MEANA vibrant and relevant for decades to come.
Together, we can build a culture that blends tradition with technology, and create a stronger, and more connected MEANA for the future.
