Narcissistic Homosexual; a Gay Snake Charmer
It is often not realised that the male homosexual culture of the West is not homogeneous but instead a conglomeration of several sexual types. One of these is the Sexual Invert, which we have discussed at length. Another, just as important but much less well-understood, is the Narcissistic Homosexual.
‘Sexual Inverts’ are either male with female sexuality or female with male sexuality. In other words, their sexuality is the inverse of what might be expected for their sex. They were described by Karl Ulrichs and Havelock Ellis amongst others. Since gender is the means by which we communicate our sexuality to others, male inverts desire to be feminine and females, masculine. The specific expression ranges from, in males, mildly camp to full social, hormonal and surgical transition, to True or homosexual transsexualism, HSTS. (It is a scale of variation.) All male sexual inverts are naturally more or less feminised and all female sexual inverts are naturally the opposite. They often have real difficulty living in the gender their sex would suggest.
Theirs is not, however, the only form that male homosexuality can take.
‘the homosexual makes love to a person of the SAME sex — in a way, to his REFLECTION. In this respect, homosexual relations are highly narcissistic’ — Sam Vaknin.
The ‘accommodationist’; or ‘assimilationist’ male homosexual movement, which I call the New Gay Man, is the dominant expression of male homosexuality in the Anglo-Saxon West today, although not in the rest of the world. This actually appeared in the decade beginning in 1960 and, by 1990, had become pre-eminent. Although it is centred around a core of non-transitioning male sexual inverts, it is dominated by another male homosexual type, the Narcissist Homosexual.
This man is attracted to his own masculinity and detests any sign of femininity either in himself or his partners. He is far from the ‘gentle and sweet’ image of male homosexuality that the New Gay Man exists to promote. Instead he may be a vicious exploiter.
He can be bullying and coercive, and may behave in an arrogant, bombastic manner, shouting down his opponents. Stephen Fry, famously of this type, has made something of a selling point of this; his avuncular affectation does little to disguise it. But Fry is by no means alone and also, by no means the worst.
Such a man will attempt to eradicate any sign of femininity in his partners. His attraction is never to femininity but always to masculinity, of a form that he idolises — either as he himself once was, or as he is now. This man suffers, like autogynephilic transvestites (AGP), from an Erotic Target Location Error. His sexual target is located inside himself, instead of outside, in another person. When he seeks a partner, he seeks the reflection of what he sees in himself. But, unlike the AGP, that sexual target is not a woman but a ‘perfect boy’; the expression of male beauty that the Narcissist Homosexual believes he himself is, which was conceived when he first began to become sexually self-aware.
In 1992, a study by Freund and Wilson established that homosexual males were significantly more likely to be paedophilic than heterosexual men.
This propensity may have begun in his private masturbation sessions or in experiments with group masturbation with other boys. If he was in an environment where there were no girls, like the infamous English Public Schools (actually fee-paying private schools,) which are notorious breeding-grounds for pederasty, this form of sex might have been his only experience, as a youth. In it, he may have been pedicated by older boys and possibly masters, before himself becoming a pederast in his later school years.
This element of the system is usually over-estimated. Quentin Crisp, the famous English sexual invert who attended a school like this, could only describe one such incident. The likelihood is that most homosexual activity in these establishments is not penetrative but rather, exploratory. Nevertheless, enough is penetrative for it to have been widely noted. Indeed, across Europe, pederasty became known as ‘the English condition’.
Most boys who go through this system manage to normalise it as part of growing up to lead a conventional male life. They get married, have children and so on. Some, however, may have become fascinated by the juvenile male body, as a direct result of their interaction with others like themselves and, once sensitised, continued to pursue it even as they aged. This is, of course, the classic pederast. His principal sexual targets are youthful boys. Examples are too numerous to list, but we all know of Oscar Wilde, a classic.
The narcissistic homosexual as husband
This man may marry, although he is unlikely to make a pleasant husband. He will not have any of the empathy for women that a Sexual Invert would — but then, very few such inverts ever marry, except for social reasons. He is not attracted to femininity, but to youthful masculinity and in his relationships with women, will see them as boys. If he does form relationships with women, he will prefer them to adopt boyish looks and demeanour; a preference for androgyny is likely.
If he marries and then has affairs (which he is likely to,) the Narcissistic Homosexual will tend have them with other males, not women, although some may become serial users of prostitutes. This seems to be related to the idea of demeaning the women involved. Since these men detest femininity, they are not seeking to replicate the pleasures of a mutually loving relationship, but their internal fantasies of abusing women. These men are not bisexual, nor are they homosexual in the way that a male sexual invert is. Instead they are fetishists, indulging in a range of activities that satisfy these.
(Amongst these men, ‘spanking’ porn, where women are administered corporal punishment as an act of sex, appears popular. This might have resulted from experiencing such punishment themselves as boys, but more likely is caused by an eroticisation of such behaviour as a means of demeaning the sexual target. This might be related to an upbringing in which sex or masturbation was condemned by parents, church or school; the subject punishes his sexual target or, paradoxically, some may invert this and seek to be physically abused themselves. There is clear evidence, from the services offered by escort ‘Mistresses’, that this goes much further than pornography and is not restricted to narcissistic homosexuals.)
The narcissistic homosexual and penetration
Narcissistic Homosexuals usually dislike being penetrated, unlike male Sexual Inverts or non-transitioned autogynephiles, who also constitute part of New Gay Man culture. As a result their repertoire of sexual practice is restricted in that regard. If they penetrate, it will usually be as pederasts, with younger males. With men of their own age or near to it, they may still penetrate, seeking out Sexual Inverts to satisfy themselves — the younger the better.
To an extent, this appears to be the ‘ideal relationship’ of an older pederastic homosexual, whose desire is to penetrate youthful males, and a younger sexual invert whose desire is to be penetrated by older males. It is less simple, though, because any femininity on the part of their sexual target will repulse them and it is hard for a male sexual invert to hide his femininity. This may result in the older, penetrating male mentally — or even physically — abusing the younger one, since he sees femininity as disgusting. Just as those who use prostitutes may demean them because they are women, they may demean feminine boys for being womanly.
As well as that, from the narcissistic homosexual’s perspective, attraction can only be maintained as long as the invert remains both youthful and sufficiently masculine. This is a tightrope and eventually the invert is almost bound to fall off it — at which point the narcissist will seek another target. The narcissist — because of what he is — is stimulated by the act of conquest; the more juvenile bottoms he can pedicate the better. This is on of the causes of the notoriously high levels of promiscuity in New Gay Man culture.
Perhaps the most distressing element of Narcissistic Homosexual behaviour, especially in its propensity towards pederasty, is that confused boys who are not actual sexual inverts can be ‘turned’ to homosexual activities and the gay lifestyle by homosexual narcissists.
There are only two ways out of this ghastly, vicious cycle, for the sexual invert. One is to transition into a woman, but this will be ferociously resisted by the New Gay Man community — witness the furore when writer Juno Dawson did so. It takes a strong will, especially if the individual has delayed long into his twenties, or even later. The other is to establish a relationship with another male sexual invert, but this again is fraught because such a relationship is fundamentally lesbian in nature. As Masters and Johnson pointed out, in this case ‘the parts don’t fit.’
Many narcissistic homosexuals, because of their absolute horror of being penetrated, or even being asked to be, will only engage in non-penetrative stimulation with similar males. Being penetrated instantly makes a man into a woman and, for a man who detests femininity and womanhood in himself and others, this would be intolerable. Freud noted that mutual masturbation was surprisingly prevalent amongst homosexuals and this is probably why.
In some cases like this, the Narcissistic Homosexual may find his sexual target getting older as he himself ages. In this case, that target will be almost a mirror image of himself. This is where the ‘clone gay’ comes from, and why there are such things as ‘bears’ — narcissistic old men who sexually stimulate each other. In these cases, at the risk of disappointing the aficionados of gay porn, the Narcissistic Homosexual is likely to focus on masturbation with similarly-inclined males. In effect, this is no different from masturbating in front of a mirror — and this kind of ‘matey masturbation’ is likely to have been a mainstay of his sexual practice since his own adolescence.
Most boys go through a period of mutual experimentation with sex. This, today, probably involves internet porn. Decades ago, it was girly magazines, which were coveted and shared, often surviving for years under adolescent boys’ beds. But this is a shared sexual experience rather than an individual one. Boys show other boys how to masturbate better. This may be restricted to shared or mutual masturbation but might extend to ‘frotting’ where the sexual organ is rubbed on the partners’ body. Oral sex may be included but anal penetration seems much more rare.
For the majority of boys, this is a perfectly normal stage in their sexual development and as they mature they will begin to seek sex with women. They will seek to realise that which they have been rehearsing for. But some appear to get stuck in this phase. If so their principal attraction may always remain to pubescent boys, the perfect examples of juvenile masculinity that they themselves once were. This association with early masturbation may be why Narcissistic Homosexuality only ever appears in adolescence or even later, while Sexual Inversion can manifest as young as the age of two.
Sexual inverts are completely different from the Narcissistic Homosexual. Their attraction, if they are male, to masculinity is not a function of narcissism. It is a function instead of a psycho-sexual inversion. Males, with this, have female sexuality. Female sexuality is ‘to be penetrated’ and requires feminine gender to advertise this. As a result, male sexual inverts tend to be enthusiastic about being penetrated anally.
The invert’s adoption of feminine gender, however puts him immediately at odds with the narcissist, who either detests femininity as ‘unmasculine’ or is simply not attracted to it. This causes, in passing, the Narcissistic Homosexual male to adopt a bizarre, extreme form of faux masculinity, often becoming obsessed with leather gear, motorcycles and even weaponry. These individuals do not realise — or perhaps do not care — that real masculinity always contains a degree of femininity. This is what causes men to weep over their mothers’ graves and to become adoring, protective fathers. As in the Sumerian tale of An and Ki, the Sky-God and the Earth-Goddess, and in the Yin-Yang, masculinity and femininity are inseparable; it is this dichotomy that makes us human.
The conflict between two forms of male homosexuality, the Narcissistic Homosexual and the Sexual Invert, caused the celebrated falling-out between Magnus Hirschfeld, a sexual invert, and Benedict Friedlaender, a narcissistic homosexual.
Friedlaender was the first in the modern era to describe the narcissistic homosexual type. His writings went on to influence the ideas and sexuality of the Nazis, amongst others. Many of these were notorious pederasts; witness the Sturmabteilung (SA) Brownshirts and their leader, Ernst Röhm. The Hitler Youth could have been created as their feeding-ground and, across the whole of Occupied Europe, German officers were infamous for their predation on local youths. To be fair, however, the Nazis were not the only hyper-masculine, militaristic tradition to be so affected by the narcissistic homosexual, as a visitor to the tribal areas of Pakistan or Afghanistan will swiftly discover.
Originally published at Rod Fleming’s World.