Data science for dummier dummies

When i grow up i want to be like @bigdatagal, that is why i am reading her book. Shame it is so god damn hard. Let's make it dummer shall we? (i only read part 1 so far)

Part 1: Getting started with data science

Chapter 1: Hey Boss it is because of science, it is totally not just my opinion or "Getting a Basic Lay of the Data Science Landscape"

You walk into that meeting room armed with science and it is GG. Not only you brought a science to an opinion fight, you brought a Big F…ing Data Science. The scienciest type of science mankind and robokind have ever witnessed. What a slaughter. Conan could not have done it better himself.

Chapter 2: Improve everything so fast, the guys who made it commit suicide or "Identifying Alternative Big Data Solutions"

Are your employers smart? Maybe. Depends on how long it takes them before realizing you are making their jobs obsolete. Try not to feel bad ok? Only fake science makes people happy. Feeling like a horrible human being is a sign that you are making good science.

Chapter 3: Middle managers only speak Excel or "Distinguishing Business Intelligence and Data Science"

Big Data begins where Excel ends. Two times for the slower ones in the crowd. Big Data only begins after Excel has ended. When all you have is Excel, everything starts to look like a risky career decision. Sure i will let you check with your wife first, but i was only asking if you wanted to learn python.