I’m afraid i must disagree with all of the points you’re trying to make here. You can’t just declare wireframes dead because you had some bad experiences working with UX designers. That’s ridiculous.
Wireframes are not at all about giving power to UX designers or anyone else. Wireframes (in all their manifestations; from quick sketches, to medium fidelity wireframes, all the way up to interactive prototypes) are tools to communicate how a digital product (such as a website or app) should function and behave (not how it should look). If wireframes sit in the way of your workflow and make you feel angry, the people you’re working with, are doing it wrong.