I guess I’m maybe in the minority, but I think if you’re having a large-ish wedding with…
Ellen Kittle
11

I actually love registries (and love amazon wish lists for the same reason). I feel really happy when I can buy somebody some of the cloth napkins they want, and know somebody else will complete the set with me. If I could find the perfect soup spoon, and convince someone to give me one a year until I have a full set, it would be like some kind of dream. My non-registry wasn’t a political stance; with a ceremony so small it was almost an elopment, I was surprised when a few distant non-relatives wanted to give me stuff anyway. It was sweet, and very kind.

That was my point, really — that I don’t think Megan needs to worry about picking a bad gift. Just knowing that somebody cares how you’re doing is nice, and I don’t think making a registry means you’re keeping score or pressuring guests to get spendy.

Meanwhile, my best friend and I mostly give each other registry-ish gifts for birthdays and holidays, towels and serving spoons and things that didn’t seem necessary until we’d been through a lot of years of not having good ones. It’d be great if everybody had a registry going, so I could helpfully replace chipped teacups and buy stationery refills. Maybe this is the future of pinterest.

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