Trying to control what people say about you when you’re not around is a doomed effort. Pronouns would be the very least of it!
Also, (and I know this doesn’t apply to everyone’s brains) my brain has a hard enough time remembering names once, so if someone changes status it always prompts me with the original name/pronoun first. Obviously, I try not to say this, but it does cause some delay while I translate. Gender, marriage surname changes, whatever: my brain is still hardwired with the original data. Sorry, it’s not you, it’s me.