Mormonism Is So Weird
Seriously, why do people even listen to missionaries from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints? What they believe is so weird! How do they manage to go around baptizing so many people all the time?
Latter-day Saints believe that Jesus arose from the dead and appeared to people in ancient America, just because the Book of Mormon says so. True Christians know that Jesus arose from the dead and appeared to people in the Levant. Totally different. And we know that this is a historical fact because it says so right in the Bible. Everyone knows that everything in the Bible is a historical fact because Jerusalem is a real place. (We also know that Jesus would never have appeared to anyone else, because it would be in the Bible if that were the case, no matter how far away from the Bible writers those people were.)
Latter-day Saints believe that Joseph Smith saw God the Father and the Son face-to-face, but true Christians know that no man can look upon God and live. Well, except for when John the Revelator saw the Father and the Son. And when Stephen saw the Father and the Son. And when Moses spoke to God face-to-face, as one man speaks to another. And when Isaiah saw God in the temple, and…oh, well, anyway, we know that people can’t see God, so Joseph Smith obviously lied!
