The best relationship (or breakup) advice Sting ever gave — Sting is my relationship seer. While others may turn to tarot or a psychic reading, I have often turned to Sting for sage advice on what to do when faced with a difficult relationship decision. Of all his songs, the seminal “If You Love Somebody Set Them Free” has haunted…

And the messy and humbling quest to figure out how to best support children and young people — I recently found my match in a group of nine-year-old boys who pushed me to the edge of my skills and made me question what I’m doing. I wish there was a better way to tell this story or paint a glossy picture to give you hope. Alas, I cannot…

And why it’s important to not rescue them when they are feeling down — I’m Benny and I knew instantly the Enneagram 7 was my leading type when I first came across the tool twenty-five years ago. What people don’t often see behind my naturally buoyant and enthusiastic mask is a deep well of emotional sensitivity. The Enneagram is an enormously powerful map for…

5 questions to ask any child (or yourself) to reset for a better day — Parents and schools call me when they don’t know what to do with a challenging child. I’ve seen a few things after working with children on and off for twenty-five years. And almost always what’s happening on the surface isn’t the whole story. The challenges children face are not that…

Knowing when it’s right to intervene, withdraw or remain silent — I’ve been struggling with the dilemma of how to be involved in and support my friends as they struggle in various areas of their life. This has forced me to reflect on my ethics and spiritual values around compassion and detachment. I grew up in the 1980s and 90s —…

The United Nations only just passed the right to a clean and healthy environment. What can’t we yet see? — The Universal Declaration of Human Rights was proclaimed by the United Nations General Assembly in 1948, largely in response to the violation of human rights in the lead up to and throughout World War II. It wasn’t that human rights didn’t exist before this time, for they are universal and…

How going into exile is the great archetypal initiation, seconded only by emerging from it. — Initiation can take many forms in a hero’s journey. Exile is the initiation that taunts me the most. I don’t mean in the classic sense of being banished from one’s country. …

Why would I trade a little detachment for another hair on my head? — I’ve never quite understood it when people say they want to go back to being a teenager again. Then something happened today that reminded me why I don’t. I guess for some, those years hold memories of joy and adventure. …

A poem to honour and respect the way it shows up for you — Success comes in many forms, The first breath after we are born; We feel it when we take a stand, And grasp a pen in our little hand. Success comes the courageous day, Our thoughts form into words to say; Expressing what’s uniquely mine, Gives me power to self-define. Success…