When You Stop Resisting The Hard, It Becomes Easy
I became a mum about 9 years ago when the beautiful, wonderful T came into my life. It was, like most mums would agree, a HUGE change.
And for the first few weeks, figuring out the breastfeeding (which was one of the toughest things I have EVER done!), the lack of sleep, the constant self-doubt about whether I had what it took to be a mother, the conflict between the way I had been brought up and the way my intuition seemed to be taking me, ALL OF IT was tough. I wondered what I had got myself into but then I would look at this awesome bundle of joy and it would seem worth it.
And so a few weeks in, I decided to try and figure out the sleep thing — I was dying from the lack of sleep and everyone talked about routines etc. So, I got myself a wonderful book that promised to teach me magic techniques of getting her to sleep without leaving her to cry.
And so, there I was in the middle of the night, keeping sleep diaries, trying to convince her to sleep, trying not to get too frustrated and then I suddenly realized that I was resisting the inevitable.
I was trying to make becoming a mum far too easy. I was trying to find the magic bullet solution and in the process, I was getting more and more frustrated because I could not find one that suited my personality and hers, in a book or even in the advice of anyone else.
And in that moment, I made a decision not to sleep a full night for the next 10 years, if necessary. I decided to stop resisting it and instead to go with it. And suddenly, everything changed.
It is hard to explain this but I relaxed in the knowledge that it would be hard and I could deal with it.
And so, I stopped moaning about lack of sleep and it stopped being hard. If anything, it got easier to handle.
Was it the change in my expectations?
Was it simply the decision?
Yes. The decision changed everything. I went on to have 2 more princesses and never complain about sleep and still function whilst loving on my girls (night and day), working at my pharmacist job, starting two businesses, maintaining a relationship with my husband and so on.
It was hard but somehow, it all became easy to handle in that moment of decision.
I listened into the conversations of lots of my friends and all the trials they faced due to the lack of sleep and I tried to explain that the resisting of the pain was enhancing the pain but most could not understand and they kept looking for magic bullet solutions or failing that, they felt drained, tired and fed up of the whole thing.
And why do I share this?
Because it is the same with business, with living out your dream and doing the work you are born to do. While you resist the pain of it, you get overwhelmed, stressed-out and frustrated. You think you are doing something wrong and so you go looking for magic bullets that do not exist. That search for magical ease eats up more of your time and you end up not doing the work that you need to do to get the result and so you further enhance your difficulties because now, everything is taking longer and longer.
And all because you resist the ‘hard’.
What if you make a decision to walk through, instead of trying to find a way around?
What if you look into the eyes of the beast and quietly decide to defeat it?
And then, with focus and deliberate determination, you keep moving forward, doing the work you know to do… Doing it and doing it AND DOING IT until it becomes a habit and it becomes easy to do.
And then, you add on something else to keep stretching yourself and moving the growth of your business forward and then you keep doing that until it becomes a new habit as well.
How much faster and easier would it be to focus on walking through the fire than to keep falling off track, looking for a quick way that YOU KNOW does not exist but the resistance keeps lying to you and making you think you can somehow skip the hard.
And so, what could have taken you 1 year ends up taking 5 or more because you keep stop-starting and getting nowhere?!
Honey, accept the hard so it becomes easy.
Walk through! Stop trying to find shortcuts. If there is any magic to be found, it will be found in YOU doing the work.
So, do the work. SIMPLE!
Fight for, deliberately design the life you are born to live.
If you are done with the stop-starting and ready to do the real work that leads to results, then work with me in the Deliberate Millionaire Fast Track to increase income, increase impact online, faster — RosemaryNonnyKnight.com/dmfasttrack