You Are ALWAYS Doing Something That Is Required Of You, But What of YOUR Agenda?
When last did you take a time out?
A time that was completely yours, to do with whatever you will?
Not a time filled with mindless entertainment that prevents you from contemplating…
Not a time when you escape thinking by flicking through Facebook, or some other technological distraction…
A time when you did nothing but think and consider your best work.
No sense of urgency, no sense of having to be anywhere — Just you, a blank sheet of paper and your brain. A time when you dig deeper into the questions that you mostly try to avoid as you rush from activity to activity, doing what is expected and required of you.
You need some space and it will not happen unless you create it.
There will always be something demanding your attention, always something that needs to be done. And as you keep doing all that seemingly urgent stuff, you coast on the surface and never ever dig deeper into your more creative parts. You never answer the questions about what you must do next to engage in your best work. You join with the ‘norms’ in taking everything at face value rather than deliberately designing your own existence.
And you are not a norm…
You are called to something that eats at you and in order to dig deeper into your real work which is nothing like anyone else has done before, you must have space.
YOU MUST HAVE SPACE!
You are not a lackey that acts only to the whims of the people around you. You live life deliberately. It is not enough to do only what others expect or want of you. That is definitely the path to destruction for your creative soul.
So how can you make space?
1) Wake up earlier
I know it feel hateful to have to do this. You are convinced you need more sleep even than what you are getting now and the truth is that you do not. You are just a little deadened inside by trying to live to fulfil all the whims and desires of people around you. So, of course, you do not want to wake up and get straight back into that.
Now you are getting deliberate about things. It is no longer about what others expect of you but more about what you want your life to look like and so you need the space of silence to think, to ask the deeper questions, to follow the rabbit trail in your head to the answer, to expand your knowledge with books outside the realm of your experience, to distil out ideas that will change you.
And so, you can now wake up earlier to follow your own agenda and you will find that you do not need as much sleep as you thought because this quiet time, first thing in the morning when your brain is fresh, will become your time.
2) Find your creative spot
Where can you do your best work? I must admit that currently, my best spot is sitting up in my bed. There are times, even in the middle of the day that I am drawn back to my well-worn spot in my bed. That is where most of my work is done. At some point, I will move out to the balcony outside my room but for now, my bed serves the purpose of creativity.
You may not be able to do that. You may be unable to avoid the lure of sleep if you sit up in bed to be silent and do your work so you must find a space for you. It might be the local coffee shop, or your home office or maybe your office at work before everyone else gets there if you still work your career.
You can also think about adding a space to your home that is yours alone.
Whatever it is, find your creative spot where you can do your work. You train yourself to switch on the moment you sit at the desk, or whip out your journal.
3) Say more no’s
People will still expect what they expect of you and you will have to say ‘no’. They will assume that your time is theirs to use, if you do not firmly make the time yours to do whatever you like with it.
A life lived just to satisfy the whims of those around you is not life at all. You do know this but there is a part of you that likes the approval that comes from fulfilling people’s expectations. Enough already. This is not your best work.
Allow yourself time to think through whether a certain request being made of you will help or hinder your progress towards the goals you have set for yourself. If necessary, get into the habit of saying ‘no’ first, thinking about it and then changing your position if you so choose. Be prepared to deal with the initial kick back as people who are not used to hearing no from you suddenly start getting it frequently. That is ok. There is always a little friction in change.
4) There will be the resistance
And yes, the resistance will rear its ugly head as YOU start to do something different. It will make carving out space seem frivolous and unnecessary. It will want you to stay on your busywork trail so that you do not face the deeper questions about where you are headed and why?
Do not give in.
This is a fight for your best life. And as always, the fight is mostly with yourself. Don’t be reluctant to take yourself on. It seems crazy but you will always be your own worst enemy. It has nothing to do with anyone else. Taking the time to create this space will enable you to make more deliberate decisions about the direction of your life, rather than just falling into the passive flow of whatever anyone wants from you.
Are you ready to go into battle for your most fulfilling, successful life?RosemaryNonnyKnight.com/impact