Divorce Poison. A book every divorced parent with shared custody needs to read.
I had to share a book I’m reading right now and that every parent going through a difficult divorce absolutely needs to read. The book is Divorce Poison: How to Protect Your Family from Bad-mouthing and Brainwashingby Dr. Richard A. Warshak.
Divorce Poison is the definitive guide on preventing parental alienation; where one parent seeks to turn their child against the other parent. It’s common in divorce and incredibly damaging.
Here are some signs:
A once loving child is suddenly rude and constantly bashing one parent.
The child rejects one parent while idolizing the other.
One parent is all bad. The other parent; perfect.
The child who once had a close loving relationship with the parent now refuses to see them.
Be careful. These are all signs of parental alienation at work.
The child, even though acting out, is the victim. The real perpetrator is the angry parent seeking to break the bond between parent and child.
This book gives details examples of how to spot alienation at work, the motives behind alienation and why your spouse might be attempting this, plus strategies to re-establish a bond with a child who’s been brainwashed.
Dr. Warshak gives you the knowledge to counteract relationship sabotage and heal your damaged relationship. He also has a chapter devoted to deciding when it’s time to seek professional help.
The book’s most important advice is this: confront it. React. Respond. Don’t turn away and think that alienation will go away. Inaction and silence don’t work.
The author’s website, www.warshak.com, has resources and recommendations for families dealing with alienation. (The author even has a DVD series for kids who’ve been the victim of alienation, Welcome Back, Pluto, available on his website.)
Even if your divorce is drama free, be prepared and get a copy. Being aware of the warning signs could save your relationship with your child if parental alienation ever begins.
Divorce Poison has a powerful message: If you are losing the loving relationship with your child, fight back before it is too late.
Have you experienced alienation in the relationship with your child? How have you handled it? If you have, please share your experiences.