The image is actually an iTouch by Rox of Spazhouse

I Never Wanted You, But Thank You

Roxanne Henkle
Jan 13 · 5 min read

I did not want you. At all. Due to advancement in technology and communication I felt that I was pushed into purchasing you. I was perfectly, almost happy with the smart burner phone (LG) with the very cool phone number I had for years. People to this day ask how I received such a spy sounding phone number. I paid for my service as I went along. Unused credits rolled over all the time and only when I roamed from my area code did I see a decrease in my credits. But, I prided myself in telling people that I can simply toss this burner and get another. Life was so easy.

I will be honest, I paired my LG it with the cheaper Apple iTouch, an Ipad with cellular, my handy 160 gig iPod Classic and a 13" Retina Macbook Pro. I was able to get reading done, connect with people via the iTouch and iPad (recording a podcast through an iPad in the day was adventuresome. This was my every day carry. Well not everyday.

In June of 2015 our mom had passed away. The task of closing our mom’s estate came to me. I was freelancing and working on a very large project and was able to work near anywhere and I was happy to lighten the load off of our sister. Binghamton, NY worked on citywide free wifi and it worked quite well, closing out her accounts and getting work done. The real issue came in when texting. Back in the day with pay as you go/burner phones, calls were funded by the credits you bought. They were pretty cheap. Texting on the other hand was not. The cost of credits were small compared to the cost of sending a text. My four other siblings were texting and I were texting over the few weeks I spent in New York. I plowed through my stored up credits.

Technology was advancing in 2015. As art director in printing I am quite aware of the advancement in tech. Scheduled obsoleted software is the bane of being productive. There was a last straw between my burner phone, but I am hard pressed to recall it. I just remember finding myself walking down the street to my AT&T store in the summer heat.

I did not want you. My friends had gold phones and yet out of all the Mac products your siren call did not reach me. I was being pragmatic in my choice, 64 gigs in a compact format. This purchase would double my iTouch storage, which I did use to its extent. I bought the gold iPhone 6. Though I really did not want you.

Never purchase a phone if you have somewhere to go. It just adds to the aggravation of purchasing something you would rather not. I required that my burner number get transferred over. Then time slowed, during all this transfer ordeal, not all of my contacts transferred over. I just want to get out of the store. And the he price was more than I had ever paid for a burner phone or iTouch. It was almost four hundred dollars less than the Macbook Pro I purchased in last 2013. At least I was able to write it off as a work expense.

I was good to you, I purchased a nice BookBook (several in fact over the years. That is another post) case from Twelve South for you. I enjoyed reading books on you so it was fitting. You iPhone 6 became a companion, even if I did not want you. I certainly did not name you like I name my other devices. Bikes, (Barrymore, Weatherwax, McQueen and Vetinari), desktops, laptops and iPads (Unseen University, Babbage, Bleak House) have connection names. I never bothered to change your name. It was always Roxanne’s iPhone.

Your camera was good and texting was good under the plan. Not as good as my Panasonic Lumix, but, you were there and it was easier to take a photo, post it than with you than carting around an extra camera. I am certainly no Annie Leibowitz, but I can compose an image. I traveled with you over the course of four and half years in my possession around the U.S. and to Europe. You allowed travel to be relatively easy with all the travel apps. I was able to post a photo into Medium from you and then type and edit on my laptop (Bleak House).

Technology has a way of reminding everyone that we are on a hedonic tread mill. Fancy, shiny and new phones that begged to be looked at came and went over the four and half years. I would catch up about phone camera technology through friends of mine one, who is a pro photographer and has shot the TPC Sawgrass with an iPhone. She was very excited about the iPhone X, but I did not feel the call. I was content with you, until IOS 13 came out.

Apple announced that you iPhone 6 would not be allowed to update. Even though I had sunk money over the years into it to keep it going such as new batteries and glass fronts, then the mic going out. It really was time. Apple like all tech companies in our world is forever nudging (or pushing) individuals into purchases. The shove came in that notification.

I could try to use two tin cans and string, but the message gets tangled on the receiving end. I purchased an iPhone 11 that I would rather not buy as well. (Though camera is very nice and the color green is quite intriguing). I did not take a photo of you when I traded you in. I should have. I left you with the Apple sales person and did not look back. I had to go home and perform the arduous backup task to set up Roxanne’s iPhone 11.

My hopes for the new year of 2020 and the beginning of the roaring 20s is that this faster, more storage, very nice camera would last me into my 60s. By then phone implants should be available.

See Roxanne’s iPhone 6, I am honoring you the Maria Kondo way. Honor and thanking. I may not have wanted you, but I did find you very indispensable. My hope for you or your harvested parts go to someone who would love you. Thank you for your service, Rox

Written by

Although not a household name, “Roxanne” could be synonymous with virtual and local research assistance. Spazhouse, Intuitive Research

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