The Human Condition Can Really Interfere With Happiness…..If You Let it

A compelling video by Jason Silva (Love is the Greatest Pain) describes the painful truth that everything good in life comes with a feeling of dread. When we experience joy we also experience the pain of knowing that everything in life is temporary and no matter how badly we want to hold on to joy it will eventually erode into nothingness.

As awkward and uncomfortable as this truth feels I also had a sense of relief after hearing this. At first I could not imagine why I would feel relief in hearing a truth as ruthless as everything I know and love is going to someday not exist.

My comfort came from just knowing. My comfort came from just understanding what was going on.

Apparently we all experience this at some point in our lives. We fall deeply in love but along with the deep sense of love and attraction comes a sense of sadness that it won’t last. Even if we stay with our soulmate for a lifetime, at some point it will all end and that person we love so much will be gone. The love we share will evaporate with our passing.


Well, not so much.

The comfort I felt came from identifying this truth as the reason I have always felt a little sadness in everything that has ever made me happy.

I could never really pinpoint the reason why I felt this lack of complete happiness until now and that was comforting. Once I realized that this was the thing causing me to never feel complete joy I was actually able to start feeling complete joy.

It sounds a bit odd but simply understanding what it was that took the edge off of my happiness in the past took the sadness away.

I was able to see what was happening so I was able to offset that dread by realizing the fact that something was going to end did not have any bearing on how much I could enjoy it in the moment. Hooray!!! Total happiness now!

The other thing that helped me feel total joy in my human experiences was knowing that this was not just me. Others feel the same thing.

Apparently all of us feel this at some level. Just knowing this was a huge relief for me. It not only allowed me to understand what was bothering me all these years but it also allowed me to feel like a normal human being.

I can now love everything with no feeling of melancholy. I can rationalize the reasoning of why we suffer from knowing the impermanence of life without letting it dilute my happiness in any way. Basically, I am OK with it all because now I know what is going on and I know I am normal.

I am so glad to be able to describe this to my two young sons so they can understand what they are feeling when they fall in love but feel sad at the same time. It is not the bummer it seems once it is understood.


Steve Miller