What is Equanimity (and why you should care)
When I decided to write a book on equanimity, I was frequently met with puzzled expressions when I explained what I was doing to friends. Most had never heard of word. To put it simply, equanimity means remaining calm in the face of difficult situations. I think that you can expand it to mean not getting over-excited in good situations as well. It’s about maintaining an even temper regardless of what life throws at you.
My motivation for writing the book came in the face of a difficult life situation that I faced. I had just lost my job during an economic downturn. I had never dealt with such a situation in the past and experienced a lot of self-recrimination for becoming unemployed. It was a job that I had made quite a few life-changes to take. This included leaving a fairly stable position and moving myself and my family several hundred miles away.
After going through a phase of anger and self-pity, I came to realize that these emotions weren’t going to help me find a new job. I was able to put aside my negative feelings and put that energy to good use, eventually finding a great job back in my hometown. I learned some valuable lessons from this experience. Chief among them was the realization that I am often my own worst enemy. Stopping the negative mental chatter in my mind was essential to my “recovery.” I realized that the quicker I can get to a state of calm about what is going on in my life, the better I am able to deal with adversity. And not getting over-excited when things are going well is also helpful. Don’t get me wrong. I do celebrate the victories, but I try not revel in them. That doesn’t help with whatever future actions I may need to take.
In my book I mention several actions one can take to enhance equanimity. When dealing with a negative situation, it is important to go through a time of reflection and even grief. To bounce back more quickly, I believe it is important to have emotional and spiritual practices in place. This may involve engaging in prayer, meditation, reflective reading, or whatever helps you to calm down. It’s important to put these practices in place before you experience a downturn. This creates one of the key benefits of equanimity; namely, resiliance.