internal, from within stuff

from the guy who still rejects it

It’s bull shit. All of it. The whole “look into yourself” monologues. You know those facebook/social media quotes with some background and some quote?

<- These things. To me I find them pretty tedious at times. However, I fully admit it, I have a huge bias in that I don’t need any encouragement. I think they’re so over the top, so repetitive of “common sense” for good mental health, something to preoccupy and post crap on feeds to masturbate an image of “sophistication”, and how you’re going through something and sometimes this holds true but I’d like to think I’m wrong quite a lot.

It’s not complete bullshit

If you’re not willing to try it, you’re just avoiding the fix for whatever reason. I’d rather brute force an infinite amount of things than to look “deep within myself”. Heck, if you tell me to sit myself down and tell me to actually acknowledge that shit is not fine, I’ll brush it off, I’ll only amp up my brute force approach even more, picking up and stacking up more the best habits, anything to avoid the cheesy lubby dubby “everything comes from within”.

It just doesn’t work… I’ve went about this for almost 2–3 years now and no matter what I do, it’s only a temporal patch that will last me until I reach the brink of exhaustion.

For those of you out there and if somehow this message gets time traveled back to the past, if you think you can win with brute force will power alone, discarding the concept of self indulgence and or respect, love, etc, NOPE.

Pure brute forcing your way out is just motivation without purpose.

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