Love at First Click

Online dating puts you in a position that is somewhat unique when compared with traditional methods of meeting people. You’re bombarded with a constantly-growing list of names without faces and faces without names. It gets hard to separate one from another, and in many cases you’re really just grasping at straws. Even after you’ve been in touch with a potential partner through the online dating site several times, it can be hard to know whether it’s worth pursuing or not.

You need to be able to hone in and figure out what it is that you’re really looking for, and whether the person on the other end of the Internet really meets those criteria. You need something to separate the good from the better, and the better from the best.

So, what factors in to whether or not you’re going to feel like it’s love at first click? There are several important aspects, and they don’t always have to do with a list of characteristics.

Intuition and emotion

Television and movies tell us that romantic love is something that tends to surprise us, rather than something we go out and find. Countless movies tell the tale of the girl who finally realizes that the best friend she’s had all along is really the guy she’s crazy about. (The obvious exception is Pretty in Pink, of course. We still think she should have gone for Ducky.)

That may work fine for the movies, but in the real world there is a rational element, too. You need to put your brain to work for you and be a little bit choosy about who you’re willing to date. From there, you can let your intuition take over.

The importance of analysis

It’s easy to over-analyze relationships, but it’s also easy to under-analyze them, too. After you’ve been in contact with someone several times and, preferably, met them in person at least once or twice, you need to step back. Ask yourself how you feel about them. Figure out if you’re pleased with their personality, their looks, their beliefs and their lifestyle. If not, move on.

Ultimately, how successful you are in the online dating scene will depend less on falling in love at first click and more on being truly and utterly determined to find the right person for you.

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Ruby Gardner — Dating Expert with a strong educational background in psychology and human relationships.