Happy 50th Anniversary, Mom and Dad!

May 13th, 2020, is my parent’s 50th wedding anniversary! A real milestone for celebration!!

We had it all planned out. My parents live in India. We live in Connecticut. My brother lives in Texas. We were all going to get together in India, have a big celebration with friends and family, and then go for a family trip together. Now, we are making plans to do a Zoom call.

We are one of the many nuclear families in the modern era. Education, opportunity, upward mobility, a perception of a better life — led us to different cities, countries, continents. When the world was flat, “distance” was just a word. But with the borders closed, and the planes grounded — the word distance has suddenly become “real.”

We are not alone. Many have had to postpone weddings. Families are delaying graduations, celebrations, get-togethers. Dinner with friends is a distant memory. Eating out, going to the movies, walking in the park, shopping, traveling, camping — the many distractions of modern life are on hold.

For many, it has brought extreme economic hardship. For others, it has been a time spent working from home, with the family, finding new passions or indulging in old ones — reading, painting, cooking, singing, gardening, producing TikTok videos. We are slowly adjusting to the newfound pace of life. Some are ready to hit the RESET button.

One thing is for sure; life is like a car on cruise control — till traffic conditions change. Sometimes you have to tap on the brakes; other times, change the lanes. Or even take a detour. Here are my 5 C’s of life:

1. Cruise, or a Crusade (depends on our perspective): We find the balance in our lives and continue the journey. There are ups and downs, but the overall direction of life remains the same. We get up in the morning, conduct our daily chores. Some days are more exciting than others, we make plans for the next day, for the weekend, for the future. We dream, we laugh, sometimes we cry. We go to bed. The circadian rhythm continues.
2. Change: It is inevitable. It is a point in time. It comes in many forms. A big promotion. An ex-pat posting. A death in the family. A natural disaster. An accident. Our ability to deal with change varies, and that is okay.
3. Confidence: The first human reaction to change is confidence. Either euphoria — and the confidence to take on the world. Or the willpower — the courage to overcome the hurdle life just threw at us. We feel the adrenaline rush. Our lizard brains tell us — we can survive this and come out better on the other side.
4. Challenge: And then we realize it is not what we thought it would be. We despair. We drown. We react. We either become aggressive, or we enter our cocoons. However, we hesitate to reach out for help. Maybe we should.
5. Choice: And then we make choices. To continue the journey as is. Or walk a new pathway. Or RESET. Decisions are never easy. However, informed decisions can give us solace in the short-term, and have the potential for serendipitous joy in the long run.

And the cruise (or the crusade) continues till the next change happens.

Some people experience more change, others less. For some, the period from change to crusade is short, for others, more prolonged. And, so goes on the journey of life.

Coming back to where I started — we had planned to celebrate my parent’s 50th anniversary together. Now, we can’t. We are disappointed. But everyone has accepted the change. We are currently planning what we will do once we are beyond the current pandemic, when planes fly again, and when the families can come together once more. We will indeed celebrate their 51st! In the meantime, my brother and I have instituted a merit-cum-means scholarship in their honor at my dad’s (and mine) alma mater — Indian Institute of Technology, Roorkee.

One thing we have learned — we should count our blessings. We should take this time to reflect. And if we want, it’s okay to RESET.

I am in the process of a RESET as well, but more on that in the future!

Happy 50th Anniversary, mom and dad!

Be well!

Ruchin Kansal

Founder and Managing Director, Kansal & Company

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If you are considering hitting that RESET button, give us a call! We’ll help you get on the right track https://kansal3c.com/apply