If you’re struggling with addiction and refuse to address it, there are only three ways it will end — you’ll “sober up, get covered up or…medium.com
1. Go to meetings
2. Get a sponser
3. Work the steps
4. Be of service
Finding a sponser who might not be a witness is tough for me. There is some skepticism about a sponser that may be legitimate (“No where in the first 164 pages of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous does it tell the newcomer or any other member of A.A. to get a sponsor…[maybe] A.A. recovery rates have plummeted from its stellar 50% to 75% success rates of the 1940's to a dismal 10% or less success rate in the rooms today is due to poor and ineffective sponsorship”).
Sponsors leave, get busy, have their own idiosyncrasies, and sometimes a newcomer may feel like they are helping their sponsor rather than the other way around.
Can I boil my program down to 1. Go to Meetings 2. Work the Steps 3. Be of Service?
“Resentment is the “number one” offender. It destroys more alcoholics than anything else. From it stem all forms of spiritual disease. (Page 64)” // “[I] have listed and analyzed [my] resentments. [I] have begun to comprehend their futility. (Page 70)” // “I can’t afford resentments against anyone, because they are the build-up of another drunk. (Page 325)”
My resentment is that my reputation — which matters more than money or power — has been harmed in my view. While “[a]ll go wrong sometimes..the wise try to hide the errors, but fools boast of them” (Garcian #126).
I made a mistake that cost me my reputation — there is no where I can go where Google won’t find me, when I go to family functions gossips in my family bring it up because they read it in the paper, and it has an adverse impact on my professional prospects. While the SOB prayer, in my mind, can be boiled down to “bless them, change me” (where them is the person the alcoholic resents) that isn’t sufficient for me to get rid of the resentment that leads me drink.
“But..here one can help with that other great rule of life: learn to forget.” (Garcian #126).