I don’t assume such a thing; I observe it. The differing life goals and outcomes are not due to our societal customs entirely, because roughly the same gender roles exist in almost every single moderately successful human society that exists or has ever existed. (The only exceptions I’ve found to this have been some isolated, primitive mountain or island tribes here and there, most of which are the size of a small clan and declining — not exactly successful societies.)
As long as everyone involved is making their own choices, as far as we can ensure that they are doing so — in other words, everyone has equality before the law — then there’s not much we can or should do via legislation. Everyone’s equal before the law, let the chips fall where they may. For the same reason, I don’t care that men pay more for car insurance, because men generally cause the majority of fatal accidents.
So if you want to encourage women and girls to take on traditionally male roles or go into traditionally male fields, and you sponsor them to do so with your own money, then more power to you. If you raise your children in a gender-neutral way, more power to you. I predict that it will fail, but I don’t care. And maybe you’ll prove me wrong.
It is when you advocate for unequal treatment before the law (such as State-enforced quota systems) in order to enforce the outcome that you perceive as “natural,” that we have a problem.