From Mom to Working Mom.. and everything in between

Avni Savant
Jul 21, 2017 · 4 min read

“T- 0" days to when the bliss that is maternity leave ends. I have spent these past few days in anticipation of how this D- day was going to be like. Spending all my time with my little baby girl since she was born 6 months back has been a life changing experience. Not only do I feel content looking at her sweet innocent eyes but it has also made me stronger — mentally, teaching me patience, resilience and physically strong — thanks to hours of rocking her to sleep in these past 6months!

Honestly, I had been dreading getting back to work post my maternity leave since the last two months. The picture of being away from my little baby in a high pace tech job was not fitting with the image of the motherly, compassionate person I had become. Truth be told I was also anxious of my skill sets being rusted as I had been out of touch for a while. Technology and business needs change every single day and here I was joining back the work force after full 7 months.

“Us” on the first day of work after maternity leave

So, when the day finally arrived the mini OCD within me planned the day and all its gory details. I packed my work bag, my breast pumping bag, the dress I am going to be wearing, shoes — everything. While I am gone I wanted to make sure baby Amyra has everything she needed- from her milk bottles to her playing mat to her change of dresses and her cuddly blanket. Honestly in the morning when I stepped out of my house I saw her playing in her daddy’s arm. I was teary eyed and slightly jealous of my husband who got to spend the day with her. Regardless, I put a brave face on and stepped into the driveway bidding both of them goodbye. Whole day I avoided talking about her a lot because honestly it made me miss her a lot more. As the work day began and the hoard of meetings piled up I got immersed myself completely into this new experience. After a few hours I realized I had actually started enjoying myself. It also made me realize how much I loved my job of being a Product Manager — working with such smart engineers, problem solving and the creativity it brings.

But within no time it was the end of the day and I couldn’t wait to get home and take my little baby in my arms. Although by the time I reached home fighting bay area’s horrendous traffic Amyra had “almost” slept. I was welcomed by her dad who was rocking Amyra to sleep and I saw our sleepy little baby on his shoulders. I cuddled her to sleep on her bed.

Once she dozed off I thought to myself if it was worth the effort to work and leave this little one behind for a few hours. And my inner self said Yes! She is learning everything her parents are do and teach her. You child will follow your example, not your advice. If I want to teach her how to be a happy person I need to be a happy person in the first place. And I need to learn what makes me happy. Having a work life makes me happy and in turn a good mother. At the end of the day it wasn’t guilt which I felt. So what if she changes her dresses twice only instead of thrice and cried a little before her naps. She was well fed, clean and loved while I was gone. I was proud that both she and I made it through. It seemed like an impossible task at hand but it wasn’t bad at all until we tried it! She will learn that she can do anything she puts her mind to- whether its to be an independent working woman, a housewife, a working mom. This is what I learnt from my mother. And Amyra’s children will learn the same from her. Too soon to think about grand children? Yeah too soon :)

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