How to Question Your Beliefs and Why You Should
*Not Just the Political Ones
Do you ever think about why you believe the things you do? How and when did you decide how you felt about abortion, LGBT rights, welfare, how to define success, etc? Did you ever question what you were taught as a child? These days people seem more interested in telling others what they should believe instead of educating themselves on the issues.
Due to this current environment, I’ve started thinking about where my own beliefs stem from. I was raised in a Republican family right outside of D.C. My father worked initially in George H. W. Bush’s campaign and later got a job in the Treasury Department. You might think growing up in that environment would have made me politically inclined or at least informed, but my political opinions at the time could be neatly summed up with Bush/Reagan=good, Clinton/Gore=bad.
I didn’t know much about “being a Republican” outside of having various elephant statues around the house.
I also went to catholic school for 16 years where I was taught a great deal about the world and how people should treat each other. Not until college though did I start questioning some of what I had been taught along the way. For example I was taught I had to learn and accept everyone but my college (Seton Hall University) wouldn’t allow a student to start an LGBT alliance on campus. That seemed wrong to me, but I also saw that there were plenty of students who easily accepted this as being the right thing to do.
This is probably where my transition away from traditional Republican values began. When “W” was elected I was hopeful for a return to what I knew as a child, which was really just “stability,” or what I thought was stability. But it didn’t help to see all the controversy surrounding President George W. Bush and the decisions that led to the war in Iraq. I also learned a lot in my first jobs and internships (in substance abuse facilities) about the “War on Drugs” and how treatment and support were needed more than ineffective harsh sentences and negative stigmas. Then came Barack Obama, a candidate for president that I felt more reflected a lot of my values, and the transition was well on its way.
Questioning our beliefs does not necessarily mean changing them.
This doesn’t mean I am done questioning beliefs though. As a therapist, now I focus on helping others question their beliefs about themselves and their environments. When depressed, all of your beliefs about yourself and the world around you become pessimistic. When anxious, everything you encounter is dangerous or stressful. In therapy I try to help people question these beliefs, and to build new ones that help them accomplish their goals. Part of this work means helping people identify where, when, and from whom they first learned these beliefs.
How to Question Your Beliefs:
Ask yourself:
- When did I first start believing _________?
- Who taught me ___________?
- Did I ever question this teaching or seek to educate myself on the issue from various multiple sources?
- What would it mean if you changed your mind on this issue? Who would it affect?
- Have I ever discussed this issue with someone who disagrees or sees it in a different way?
All of these questions are healthy ways for you to explore your beliefs and to help understand others.
Why You Should Question Them:
Our brains crave novelty and learning. Make yourself uncomfortable. Be curious and adaptable and your brain will thank you for it as you age. There is a concept known as Brain Plasticity, which refers to the brain’s ability to CHANGE throughout life. These changes are good for our brain and may even help us lead longer lives.
For my patients, questioning beliefs about themselves is even more important. If a person with depression can go from feeling that they are worthless or helpless (a common belief in people struggling with depression) to even a neutral belief like “things can work out” or “I can make small positive changes,” it will make a huge difference in their ability to recover. Similarly, a little bit of curiosity goes a long way in the fight against anxiety. Instead of anxiously avoiding social situations for example, a person might question their anxious beliefs by saying to themselves, “I wonder how bad it could be if I only stay for 5 minutes.”
I now challenge you to start questioning some beliefs of your own. You might find some new information or some new ways to connect with that friend or family member on the other side of the political aisle.
As always, thanks for reading and please click the little green heart if you enjoyed it!
