Don’t hate the player, hate the game.
Systemic indifference will not make a difference. (#Day73)
In my fraternity, year after year, semester after semester, it was customary to interview all of the Associate Members (“Pledges”). These interviews consisted of a number of questions about that person’s background and interests. The second to last question, for each and every interview, is “what is your favorite quote?”
Over the course of my four years in the Fraternity, each and every time I answered with the same quote for this question; “Don’t hate the player, hate the game”.
It sounds so simple, but it could not be more applicable to our daily lives. It is so easy to become mad at or jealous of individual people for working hard, being in a better life situation than you, or having things that you don’t.
The reality is this — rather than hating on those individuals, it makes more sense to question the underlying system. Questioning the rules, relationships, group structures, promises, and penalties, which subsequently produce the rules you see, will prove much more fruitful and provide much deeper insights into the realities of the world than simply being mad at an individual.
The player is not to be at fault. They’re (hopefully) playing within the socio-cultural-economic-legal rules. Remember, this applies to everything, from job hunting to stock trading, or even hooking up. It’s not about the individual people — it’s about the game, the one set up behind the curtains, the trick that we all trick ourselves into.
Next time you get mad at someone, keep this in mind.
#Day73 , #100DaysOfBlogging
