April 28, 2017

i don’t think i have ever really moved on. what is it, even? does it mean having a new partner? does it mean feeling the blood rushing in your veins, that excitement from looking into someone else’s eyes, and your heart who’s beating faster once again?

or does it mean making peace with the past? being able to wake up without thinking about them? being able to listen to a certain song and don’t feel like you have to cry your heart out as you pay attention to its lyrics?

what is moving on?

i have never really moved on. sure i have my heart for someone else, sure i can talk to you as normal as friends could be, sure i no longer have the desire of wanting you to come back, but i have never really forgotten the mistakes.

the pain i have caused you, the break up, your choice of songs, and those sketches of tall buildings.

if there’s anything i want to do, it would be fixing the past.

no.

if there’s anything i want to do, it would be driving away from you as far as possible. and to stop hating Kodaline’s High Hopes.

i am sorry.

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