Going Solo: Call to Iceland

Birgit Mohrmann
Aug 23, 2017 · 7 min read
Makoto Shinkai’s art.

Do you hear it? Your call to adventure?

Does it scare you?

Does it sound completely crazy and irrational? Do you try to ignore the call; but something about that place calls out to you?

Good, then book those flights. Do it!!!

As children, we dream impossible things and are convinced nothing will prevent them from coming true. But then we grow up, and we self-sabotage our childhood fantasies. We are so scared of the painful reality of unfulfilled dreams, we would rather not dare dream too big so we don’t have to face abject disappointment. We rationalize and pretend we behaved logical in our decision making. Most of all, we seem to listen to that puny voice that questions whether we are worthy of going on amazing adventures. That voice which reprimands us for being foolish, reckless, selfish even. So instead we are lulled into what Paulo Coelho calls “A life of Sunday afternoons.”

And even the most adventurous of us are caught in that complacency trap.

I have entered a new decade in this life and wanted to celebrate 2017 by embarking on an extraordinary adventure, a pilgrimage of sorts. I wanted to explore natural wildness, seeking something very different, ideally cheap, but otherwise, I was open to whatever place that would entice me. I found myself scouring the internet for cheap flights all over the world. I kept looking for places in which I had gone or had friends because some part of me still was leaning towards comfort rather than adventure, some part of me was still holding on the idea that I wasn’t ready. Then Iceland found me.

I came across a special with KLM return to Reykjavik for under U$800. It seemed too good to be true but I decided to hold my seat for 72 hours and take the weekend to consider my options. But my credit card was immediately charged! Wait, what? It was too late to cancel the charges and I would have incurred costly reversal fees. I was committed and that scared me.

Who impulse buys tickets without having seriously considered the destination?! Right up to then, the US was still the most likely contender for my big adventure.

All weekend I worried and then I did what any normal person would do when dealing with such a humongous decision — ignore it for a while and hope the problem resolves itself!

After the initial panic, I asked for advice from friends who have been to Iceland. What they shared wasn’t particularly reassuring. Each and everyone exclaimed it’s amazing but expensive! EVERYTHING: transport, food, accommodation, gear! A new wave of panic hit me. What did I do? The Nam Dollar doesn’t stretch far.

One friend recommended an app that would tell me when and where it would be Happy Hour in Reykjavik, called AppyHour. That calmed my nerves a little; at least I didn’t have to give up beer.

I knew very little about Iceland other than falling in love with its scenery in movies like Walter Mitty and Prometheus. My favorite Japanese artist, Makoto Shinkai, draws anime scenes which are bathed in the radiance of the auroras and fill my heart with wonder. Iceland’s Northern Lights, its icy waterfalls, the unpronounceable volcanoes, and the extreme landscape fascinated me, but the country seemed too mystical and beyond my reach.

I figured that this would always be an unrequited dream, but turns out all I needed was an impulsive push.

Thus Iceland was never an accidental decision and I am quite amazed how serendipitous it is that my longing became real.

I started to research my travel options with the dawning realization that I am completely in over my head. But that is when I feel most like myself!

While I enjoy traveling solo, I figured it would be fun to explore this land with a small group of like-minded travelers and a local guide. I value the importance of professional guides immensely and nothing compares to the experience when a local expert shows you his home. But even the camping packages were expensive. Renting a car seemed like a good alternative and I wasn’t too intimidated by driving on right side of the road in Iceland (we cruise on the left in Namibia).

I still had to consider how expensive Iceland’s accommodation options would be, and at this stage, mixed dorm hostels seemed the only beds I could afford. Serendipity helped me again when I found Kuku Campers, an absolute bonkers looking rental company hiring out funky camper vans — it was a perfect match.

I love road trips. I love camping. And I was inspired by adventurous friends who travel in their specially converted vans in the US and Europe, so I absolutely was meant to go on this journey.

Thus I want to tell my story about my Call to Iceland. But the intention of this story isn’t to write about a batty Namibian exploring the land of Fire and Ice.

Instead, I want to record my experiment with the transformational power of travel.

For me, travel isn’t only an escape for a few weeks before I return to the reality of life. For me, travel is life! It’s as real as it comes. Travel is not only my job but my schooling of life as I learn, discover, love, grow and heal as a human being. Travel is my life-reaffirming soul connection to this world.

I want to reflect on what’s it like to travel as a solo woman; how I try to let go and trust in the flow of a journey (as a professional travel planner, that part is hard); what preparation I did; how I enjoyed the actual adventure and then, facing often the hardest part of my journey, returning home

When I travel, I feel most like myself, the best version of myself, and it’s that “self” I want to take home with me so that maybe one day there is no difference between “Travel Birgit” and “Home Birgit”! To be a hero in my life, although the magnitude of that responsibility is quite overwhelming.

I know it’s a privilege that few can afford, but little do people realize how many sacrifices I endure to make travel my lifestyle. Each time I lock my house to embark on another adventure, no matter how big or small it is, I am filled with gratitude.

My journey has already begun. I may still be home but I have already embarked on this wonderful adventure the minute I booked those flights.

Since that crazy day in May, I faced a whirlwind of emotions. From disbelief and denial, to elation, to believing I somehow am not brave enough to make my crazy dreams come true, to real concerns about running out of money or freezing to death (ok, I am exaggerating, though I always worry about not having enough money and well, I get cold easily!). But with 5 weeks to go, most of the trepidation has been replaced with delirious excitement.

Aren’t all travelers a bit mad anyway? I am not referring to tourists; there is nothing courageous about doing packaged holidays on a cruise ship. But explorers, adventurers, travelers, our kind is quite crazy!

I have planned this trip very loosely. I do prefer keeping things impulsive and spontaneous, although this is the first trip where I haven’t sorted out each nights accommodation in advance, trusting in the comfort of my Kuku van as my home for 13 nights. That kind of open planning is liberating but also very intimidating. Most of my planning was based on preparing for the cold — buy warm clothes, pack a hot water bottle, figure out what clothes are actually waterproof, pack more thermals, find wool socks — an impossible mission in Namibia!

But the most important planning will be in my mind, focused on how to travel differently. Iceland will not be the only epic adventure of my life, but I want to make the most of my two weeks there. I have been on many wonderful journeys in my life, and each has taught me something, hopefully making me a little wiser, more courageous. With each new journey, I would like to push myself more and more out of my comfort zone and Iceland is most certainly going to test that intention like no other adventure I have been on before.

As my friend Rupp explained — “I understand that if I want something I’ve never had before, I must be willing to do something I’ve never done before.”

This means, leaving my expectations and assumptions at home and opening myself up to a journey that will not be a bucket list trip.

I would like to see the northern lights, swim in hot springs, see waterfalls, photograph lighthouses, not fall into geysers, climb glaciers, walk on black beaches and so much more. But I know this depends on so many factors and wouldn’t it be a shame if my sole purpose of this journey is to check off waterfalls from a list and then miss out on enjoying especially the unexpected?

Instead, my intention should be about allowing myself to get lost, get awed, get emotional, make new friends, get scared, get elated, be brave, have fun, be bold. That should be my real bucket list.

Thus I made a promise to myself to travel with heart, wholly engaged in the experience, staying connected to the present journey with resolve, and stay wide open to the unknown.

This is my Call to Iceland.

NOT my photo — NASA Astronomy picture of the day

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