So this is how it starts

Well, I guess here goes nothing….

I have never seen myself as a good writer by any means, but I do ponder life’s “questionables” often. Not with anyone but myself — in my mind, not sharing these thoughts with an outsider. “It’s too complicated to explain”, “no one else will understand” is what I say to myself.

I also would never have thought to start a blog. When I heard of friends who had, I thought its crazy — you share your inner most thoughts with strangers. No thank you! I don’t want anyone to know what I’m thinking. Why do I care so much about what other people would think? Am I not allowed to be confused, insecure and express opinion?

But that leaves me with a dilemma; too many thoughts floating around my mind causing me a sort of constant uncertainty and many unfinished notions about, mostly complete absurdities or otherwise, valid points that need further analysis.

So that is the reason behind me deciding to start a blog — to clear my mind on a regular basis. It will be a means for me to blab, digest and deconstruct my bizarre brain. I don’t expect anyone to care too much if I’m honest. If you can relate, then great — I’m glad.

When I was younger I had hoards of diaries with all my thoughts — I would write before I went to bed, for hours on end and I loved it. Those diaries were my little babies and I would worry my sister would find, read and expose all of it. Not like there was anything particularly juicy, it was just that they were my thoughts and belonged to only me.

Well, now I guess, I will be sharing them with the cloud in the sky for anyone to see — this is a big step for me.

I view this as a kind of therapy for myself. I will be entering a new chapter of life this year, namely marriage, becoming a home owner of an 80 year old cottage in the heart of the city, that needs extensive renovations and a new, very exciting job. With all these blessings comes responsibility, AKA a shitload of anxiety. Which is what I have been suffering from pretty badly over the last few weeks. Hence the need for a venting platform.

So Thanks! Looking forward to plenty more of these opportunities.