Practice what you preach

People are always more-than-ready to tell me how to behave. How not to improperly behave. I get scolded, slapped, and scrutinized.

Fact is fact: I have been sick, mentally unwell since spring, 2007. I have been ill with an untreated/mistreated psychiatric disorder.

The lecturers, the preachers can all go to hell. I was never mentally equipped to listen, abide, or get preached to.

Whenever I have preached back – most especially, recently, as good treatment has infused my mind – guess what happens when I dish out my perspective, my points of view, my opinion.

I’m told to sit back down. Sit down. Sit right back down. By disheartening, disgusting, ready-to-dish types, never ready-to-take flimsy types. With zero ability to take back, what’s rightfully theirs, ie., my opinion of their actions.

Ha. The bizarre, ironic, horrific ironies. Pathetic, humorous, macabre. Previously, I would get riled up. Hot. Heart racing. Head pulsing.

Now, I’m getting school by experts to be cool. Experts who’re paid to help me be cool, and to stay cool. To disengage. To be dis-passionate.

I love to hear criticism, actual valid criticism. I do. Trust me, I do. I improve upon learning it.

Others though, others are not the same. Reason, and ego, take precedence.

I’m better off practicing life, day in and day out, in my own respective way.