Don’t Be Over Romantic About Your Dreams And Passions
We love to romanticize just about everything. But the reality is not as romantic as we think it is. Reality, as far as I know, is plain and mundane. In other words, reality just is. And it sure has its own beauty, depth and meaning. We, however, don’t like to accept the reality as it is especially when it does not match with our expectations. Unfortunately, we would rather choose to be ignorantly happy living inside the bubbles of romantic ideas of reality than living in the reality itself.
I am sure you must have experienced this — there are times when we romanticize about a certain person and when we actually meet that person in real time, we feel shocked to find that he/she is not the same as we thought. There are times when we romanticize about a certain place and when we actually go there, we find that it is not as good as we thought it to be or vice versa. Romanticizing is buying into the hype created by someone who doesn’t know what he is doing/saying. And most of the time, we create our own hype and without even knowing, we fall into its trap.
So, today, I want to focus on why we shouldn’t be over romantic about our dreams and passions. And I will share my own personal experiences regarding the topic. I am also going to share my little secret about how I manage to overcome my romanticism regarding my dreams and passions and how I focus on being real and consistent instead.
If you are someone who has a dream in your life, you are bound to be over romantic about it. Because it’s your dream, you have all the right in the world to do anything about it. You can work your ass off and make your dream come true. Or, you can just fantasize about it and be overly romantic about all the great things that you think are going to happen. And there is nothing wrong in being romantic about anything. There is a time and place for it. There is both joy and beauty in being romantic, it is an experience of poetry in real life.
But it starts seeming problematic when you get stuck in your romanticism. It becomes problematic when you can’t move on and start taking necessary actions on daily basis towards your dreams and goals. It becomes problematic when you start thinking that you are entitled to having whatever you dream. No, no, no. You are not entitled to anything. Just because you have a fucking dream doesn’t make you anything special. Just because you are passionate about something doesn’t necessarily guarantee any success. Because there is a huge difference between having a dream and actually doing something about it on a daily basis.
The world is already full of dreamers and there is nothing wrong with it. But we don’t want to stay as a dreamer for our entire life, we want to live our dreams. So, we must start living in the reality and start doing the things that is boring and mundane, but which actually leads us closer and closer to our dreams. And it is not impossible. When you do all the necessary things, when you take all the necessary steps, you can’t help but get the results. That is the law of nature.
I am really passionate about writing. I have a dream to become a great writer. And I love to get romantic about my dreams and passions. I imagine all sorts of things. I imagine my books getting published from a very well known publishing house and I also imagine becoming New York Time Best Seller author. I imagine myself becoming a very prolific writer. I imagine myself enjoying my creative juice till the end of my life in abundance. Sometimes, I even imagine myself winning the Nobel prize in Literature.
And not to mention, I have so many expectations from my dreams. Sometimes, I just get frustrated for not writing and publishing even a single book yet. Sometimes, I feel lost when I cannot connect the dots in my writing journey. And at such moments, I just want to give up. At such moments, I find myself becoming miserable. At such moments, I question myself. Was all the hard work and sacrifice worthwhile? At such moments, I just want to leave everything and live a normal life without having to worry about my dreams (an extra baggage). I just want to participate in the Netflix and Chill kind of life. But, deep within me, I know I must encourage myself. I must clam myself down and keep writing no matter what.
So, how do I calm myself down in the face of personal adversity? How do I overcome my over romantic nature regarding my dreams and passions and instead become real? Today, I am going to share a small secret weapon that I use whenever I encounter moments of doubts and frustrations and restlessness.
Whenever I find myself being over romantic about my dreams and passions. Whenever I have to struggle to remain consistent regarding my reading and writing passion, I try to neutralize the reaction by comparing it with the very simple and mundane and unromantic act of brushing my teeth. Now, I assume that my passion for reading and writing is not something special. I compare it with brushing my teeth. I write. I brush my teeth. I read. I brush my teeth. What is the big deal? I don’t expect anything big to happen just by brushing my teeth and yet I brush my teeth everyday without any problems. I brush my teeth everyday because it is the only way to keep my teeth clean and healthy. Nothing more and nothing less. End of all the drama.
I feel like same should be the case when it comes down to following our dreams. Don’t make it into something special. Because when you make it into a special thing, you start taking it way too much seriously and which eventually makes you so stiff from over thinking that you cannot move at all. You will then become a victim of analysis paralysis. We don’t want that to happen. We want to take one step at a time everyday without thinking just by realizing that it is the only way to make our dream come true. For me, I must write on a daily basis whether I like it or not. That is the only way to be a great writer. Simple. This is it. End of all the drama. Whatever I think after this realization will be a rationalization of my excuses.
Imagine from tomorrow, you start being over demanding and start expecting unrealistic goals just by brushing your teeth on a daily basis. I am sure you will soon give up brushing your teeth. Because the pressure is way too much. So, it’s so wise to learn to keep everything simple and basic. Indeed, simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.
Keep following your dreams on a daily basis. Be consistent. Be persistent. Be relentless. You can be romantic about your journey and you can be excited too. But don’t let those petty emotions and feelings stop you from being unstoppable. You just have to move on, keep going, there is no other option. There is no plan B. There is no shortcut. The sooner you realize this, the better. I am glad I realized it now.
So whenever you find yourself struggling to remain consistent with regards to your dreams and passions, remember the little trick I use. I hope it will help you to overcome your personal adversity and I hope it will help you to move on in the direction you should be going.
All the best!