10 Tips for PMs on How to Make the Dev Team Hate You
1 . Communicate upcoming product features with the dev team only after the design team is done, without any input at all from them.
2 . Hold the design team to really low standards — just a color coded flowchart will do as a deliverable, the devs can handle the UI.
3 . Preferably don’t write specs. Just make comments on the design and send them over to the dev team. When the dev team asks, say “Specs are overrated, they’ll just limit you.” . Wear a shirt that says “Specs are overrated” too.
4 . In the case you do write specs, don’t bother with formatting and screenshots. Also don’t go over the specs with the devs until they absolutely have to start work on the feature.
5 . Ignore the dev team’s feature estimates and force them to agree to lower estimates.
6 . Reply to questions / issues / flaws brought up in product design with “make it work, that’s what your job is.”
7 . Keep making additions to the specs and design up until the last minute. If devs ask you to prioritize, see below:
8 . Don’t try to prioritize features for release — calmly say “Just try to get it all done”.
9 . Once specs are done, don’t do any checkins. It’s the dev team’s problem now.
10 . Don’t conduct release readiness testing when devs are done. QA’s problem now. If the QA engineer asks you any questions just say “it’s in the specs”.
