Suaraku Bukan Dosamu
salam. welcome
peace be upon you. we seek not the ignorant [al-Qasas 28:55]
[one: him or Him?]
siapa nama kamu? what do you live for? who do you love?/ sometimes, we confuse submission for love. sayang, do you think of him? or Him? / but why can’t it be Her? Or Them? / shhh, that’s blasphemy
[two: TV killed the TV3 Malay star ]
hari ini kau datang riang / tersenyum buatku senang
kau hias dirimu / membuat hati bertambah saying
tapi wajahmu semalam muram /mengapa dewi mengapa
mungkinkah aku bersalah/cubalah dewi katakan
the protagonist is often fair and covers her hair, ensuring not one strand of hair can be seen. she’s the ‘wanita melayu terakhir’. open-minded but is deeply rooted to tradition and faith. she’s demure and smiles, even at the darkest of time. she can adjust to the rural and urban life. one day, she was forced to marry the obnoxious, rude son of a dato’ (the ceo of a company, who never seems to do anything but to get his secretary to cancel his meetings).
he is equally unhappy, only marrying her because his father threatened to give the company to someone else if he didn’t. he decides to make her life difficult out of spite. she accepts the abuse anyway and prays that he would change. equally just as upset is another woman — this time, she is vicious, ‘sexy’ and ‘uncovered’. she wants the son of the dato’ for herself — she wants to be rich and would do anything to get him. at the end of the series, he falls in love with her after all — the “good girl” wins, the “bad boy” changes his ways, and why wouldn’t he?
she submits to him like she submits to god
she submits to him like he’s god
[three: kama sutra for the unmarried virgins?]
in a patriarchal society, women are not allowed to rage. or if they do, their anger is dismissed. ‘women are just emotional’ they say. you’re taught to swallow your anger, put out the fire that is burning in you and just smile. it’s quite a paradox. you can be smart, but not too smart. be modern, but not too modern. be ambitious, but be careful, some men don’t like ambitious women. can work and earn, but not more than the men.
you must be a pure, untouched virgin before marriage. but be a first-class whore when you get married, so your husband won’t cheat. good sex is the solution for every relationship problem, at least according to the obedient wives club. eh haram lah, cik adik oi. how can you speak of sex when you’re an unmarried woman! tak malu ke!
[four: a conversation with a grab driver]
oh, you’re doing your masters? very good. what are you reading? my wife likes to read. she’s reading a lot of feminist books lah, dik. good lah, but i’m not sure how to… / how to what, bang? / alah, now all women want to be independent, then don’t know if can manja with them / of course can lah, just because a woman is independent doesn’t mean she doesn’t want to manja. everyone wants to love and be loved right? / okay, but then we men also want to manja / your wife also want to manja you for sure bang, but she doesn’t want to submit like you’re god. you must love your wife like she’s a person, not an item you own. / so…does that mean i should get her flowers? / why not!
wah, feminist also like romance?
we like romance, we commit. what we don’t want is to be possessed.
[five: gadis melayu]
on most days you’re fighting the patriarchy in your community. some days are longer than others because you’re also fighting the women upholding it. but you have to be careful, because you don’t need people demonising all malay/muslim men. you have love for malay men, you just can’t stand the misogyny that happens. a lot of days you spend your time fighting racism– just because they’re a feminist doesn’t mean they necessarily share the same lived experience. what happened to intersectionality? what happened to not speaking on behalf of others — but wait, you have to be careful, you don’t need men to say women cannot get along, that all we know is how to argue with each other. eh, penat lah. sial betul.
tsk, don’t curse. tak baik / nanti dosa / keep it PG, be a wholesome malay woman okay? (actually i wanted to put in p*****k instead of sial, but scared later my mother scold)
