On Cinco de Mayo, an Ode to Mexican Food

How dare you think you can touch Mexican food?

If it were a person it’d stay far from you

It’d build surveillance to track the soul-less

You wouldn’t come an inch near any frijoles

Just as the British and Spanish abandoned the French

You’ll soon be alone in a 6 ft. trench

We see you approach but our defense is too great

This country thrives on love and not hate

With no ammunition to support your attack

Your soldiers will retreat and never come back

No get-out-of-jail-free card around to use

No sane female in sight will flash their woman card for you

Here’s a concept that shouldn’t come as a surprise

You’ll soon create your very own demise

“The Apprentice” will fit you quite nicely, very soon

When you become the laughing stock of the room

The time is near for you to go home

But please, build a wall wherever you roam!

Didn’t you hear we’re allergic to terrorists?

A wall around you, now that’s my kind of fairness

You’re going to need it, to block out all reason and rhyme

That seems to be missing from your maniacal mind

Your hate speech is tired, your rhetoric — inept

Do you even have any hair left?

But please, debate your entitled self away

It just continues to affirm that love will trump hate

We see your true colors, they’re not red, white or blue

With a heart so hollow, you don’t even have a hue

The Battle of Puebla reminds us today

We’ll soon celebrate our victory day

So until we can say goodbye for good

Get your dirty, disgusting hands off our Mexican food