Factors you SHOULDN’T consider when getting into a serious relationship

I recently got into a relationship with a guy, who is really such an amazing person, and haven’t been this happy in such a long time.

Even though it’s new, we didn’t decide to commit to each other based on physical attraction alone and we certainly didn’t make this decision just for the sake of having someone.

Sadly, there are a lot of people who enter relationships because they find each other oh-so-physically attractive. Yes, because that’s what relationships are about: the love for blue eyes or the slicked-back hair or that charming smile.

It’s great to have a list of things you want in a boyfriend and a potential life-partner. But it’s not okay to reject a guy because of shallow characteristics.

Physical attraction only

Yes, you have to be physically attracted to your boyfriend or girlfriend, but just because y’all find each other so beautiful or handsome or hot, doesn’t mean you should jump into a relationship.

A relationship is three-dimensional and when it’s solely based on passion and romance, y’all won’t last for long. But when physical attraction goes hand-in-hand with emotional and spiritual connection, it’s healthy.

Race/Ethnicity

No one is restricted to love or fall in love with someone who is not of their race or ethnicity. In fact, you may even change your mind about the importance of race and ethnicity.

My boyfriend and I are an interracial couple and to be completely honest, I don’t care that he’s not Korean or Asian. I love it.

I love that we can share and learn about each other’s cultures and traditions; our relationship is more exciting. The fact that he loves Asian food and that I love Italian food though, is a plus ;)

If you had asked me 10 years ago if I cared, I would’ve strongly said yes. Up until high school, I told everyone that I would only date and marry a Korean guy, and no one else.

Then I went out of my comfort zone and through experiences, I started to disregard race and ethnicity differences as a reason to turn down a guy with who I have an emotional and spiritual connection with.

Maybe you’re steadfast on marrying someone of your race and ethnicity but if everything else is in tact, you should be open and be flexible about this. Don’t let it be a hindrance in pursuing a beautiful and healthy relationship.

His/Her past

Before you start bringing up arguments about how it matters and etc, hear me out. It’s called the past for a reason. What really matters is the person he/she is right now, and how consistent they’ve been in living the healthier or happier lifestyle.

You need to accept the fact that this person had a life before he/she met you. If you aren’t able to do that, I’m gonna be completely blunt: you’re being prideful and arrogant.

Not accepting or not moving past it may come off as you thinking you’re a perfect person. No one is perfect and and just like you want the other person to accept you for all you are, they want you to do that too.

The only exception to this is if his/her past is affecting their life in the present. That’s the only time you shouldn’t disregard and accept it, because it’s their past seeping onto the present, and that’s not healthy.

Final thoughts

There are probably more factors you wouldn’t consider when getting into a relationship, but these have been the most prominent in my life.

If you genuinely like or love this person, these small things can be overlooked, because at the end, it’s about their character, how they treat you, and most importantly, the emotional connection and friendship y’all have with each other.

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