We’re all to blame for Donald Trump’s comments on sexual assault
When someone in the public eye makes a comment about grabbing p***y, it’s easy to get out your megaphone and start shouting. It’s easy to start casting blame.
It’s harder, however, to look in the mirror and take responsibility for our own role in creating a culture — and a country — where perpetrators of sexual violence can run for president, lead Fortune 500 companies, play on professional sports teams, and star in television shows and movies we all watch.
We’re all responsible for a building a country where survivors who speak up about assault are discounted or disbelieved. We’re all responsible for laughing off inappropriate comments time and time again, whether in the locker room, on the street or in popular media. We’re all responsible for creating a culture in which perpetrators act with impunity, confident that they will get away with their crimes. Because they do.
But rape is a bipartisan issue. And the culture that creates shame and blame is something that Democrats, Republicans, men, and women have created together over generations. In a time of partisan politics and polarized discussions about sexual violence, we need to remember that sexual violence impacts us all.
Blame polarizes. Accountability unites. Instead of shifting blame from one side to another, we can all take responsibility for the times we were too uncomfortable or scared to speak up. We can remember that our discomfort doesn’t really compare to the men and women who are actually abused and assaulted every day, in every state, by perpetrators of every political background.
When we stay silent, we give power to the perpetrators. We let them blend in and believe they are supported in their thoughts, words and actions. We ensure that they don’t stand out as the offensive and harmful characters they are.
So in the midst of the hand-wringing and internet-shouting, here’s something practical you can do the next time you hear an off-color, locker-room banter kind of comment. You can say: Hey, that’s not funny. It’s disgusting. I hope no one ever does that to someone you love.
