Cherry Yogurt.

Dear Cezanne,

I’m currently in a windowless room in Bangkok. It’s my last night here but instead of going out clubbing. I am inside writing this blog entry because I promised you I would…. and I’m done drinking for now… On my last morning in Ayutthaya, I woke up early and went out to the deck. I watched the sun rise over the temple ruins, painting the river red and gold. My hotel has a banyan tree that grows out of the teak deck. I lounged underneath that tree, transfixed by the maze of branches.

The German couple from last night came outside. I gave them a smirk and walked back to my hotel room. After last night, I couldn’t bring myself to engage in chit chat with them. Yohannas, the girlfriend studies Evangelical Christianity and she calls that, American studies. The boyfriend Yohann is in law school, pro guns I might add. The girlfriend defended her choice of study by telling me that she doesn’t agree with the Evangelical’s politics or their stance on social issues but she feels that they should be studied for academic reasons. I mentioned I was gay and she immediately made the argument that not all of the Evangelicals hate gay people and would not treat them badly. I told her that didn’t really matter. This is a culture war which has real casualties, healthcare, welfare, gay and trans homelessness, police brutality. My friend jumped off the fucking Golden Gate because her Evangelical parents didn’t accept her. Please tell me again how the Evangelicals would never be mean to a gay person. She got real uncomfortable. Guess I hit a nerve. Then I mentioned I was an Atheist Jew and she started to sweat a little. I also brought up the Holocaust and Hitler Chicken. I know I’m terrible. Anh was like why did you have to scare them like that??? You are lucky they weren’t Russians, I replied.

Anyways as Anh and I were heading too 7'11 for snacks, a pack of wild dogs charged at us, teeth barred. I screamed, not my finest moment. I’m not vaccinated against rabies. The hotel owner heard me and ran out. He threw rocks and they ran away. He directed us in the opposite direction, which just happened to be through the local monastery. Twenty monks in brilliant orange robes sat on long tables, enjoying their afternoon meals in contemplative silence. When we walked through the courtyard, flustered and loud the monks stared at us, eyes wide. You could hear a pin drop. I shudder to think about all the taboos we broke. After getting back on the main road quickly I might add, guess who was waiting for us, our friends, the dogs! We backed away slowly. Anh had the bright idea of getting sticks from a pile of branches nearby. Sticks in hand, we walked down the road like we had guns. The locals were confused and the dogs were like… fuck fuck fuck. They have weapons! Retreat! I insisted on bringing my stick into 7'11. Sometimes I wonder what I would be like if I got embarrassed. As we sat on the curb, eating our snacks. I sighed, all of that hullaballoo for some fucking cherry yogurt….