I love this article and your advise. It is all true and very valuable.
I have written a short book called “Lessons from a Difficult Person; How to deal with people like us” to help people have the conversation you are talking about, with the people you are talking about.
I cover what gets in our way and I have some more suggestions and exercises that the reader can do to get into the right mental space to have the conversation without being critical and judgmental.
Face it, when we tackle the challenge of telling someone that what they do is hurting themselves and others, there is an emotional reaction. I suggest an approach where we can have conversations, not confrontations, and help ease the message of our difficult person and improve the relationship.
I have an author page of Facebook (SarahEllistonauthor) and a website if you want to see the book. Or, if you live in Cincinnati, I can sell you one more cheaply when I see you at a meeting :)