nostalgia

noun.

: a wistful or excessively sentimental yearning for return to or of some past period or irrecoverable condition;

I saw a quote before that said something about being happy when you miss something or someone because then, at least you have been lucky enough to have something to miss.

I am a lucky one.

I have so many things I miss from the past. Things I’ve regretted taking for granted. If I could only turn back time, I would definitely cherish the moments I had with my loved ones who have gone away. I would have expressed how much I appreciated them then. I would have shown how much they meant to me. But now, I can’t.

I could only sit here and smile through every nostalgic moment that come to mind.

People come and go, that is so true. But that does not mean they take away the memories you’ve shared together. That is yours to treasure forever.

I now understand that things happen for a reason. That I wouldn’t be who I am today had I not experienced everything I’ve gone through. But sometimes I can’t help but question why I had to go through all of those horrible things; why I had to feel how I felt; and why some of the important people in my life can’t seem to stay.

Sometimes I feel like I will never be happy again. That everything I have failed to appreciate before would never happen again because I lost the chance.

But then I remember how I was loved. I remember how I was important to some people. And that kept me going. Kept me hoping that I am still lovable, still worthy of the things and affection I hope will come my way.

It is ironic, I know. But that’s me, Queen of Irony. Heh.

Anyway, it’s just nostalgia talking. LOL. I just miss the way things were.