Grad School in a Pandemic

When I started graduate school there was no such thing as COVID-19. The only people who knew what a coronavirus was were microbiologists. My first quarter at UCI was fall 2019. By my second quarter, news of a novel coronavirus had started to spread. By third quarter, the university had essentially shut down in-person activity on campus. In all, I was in grad school for only six months before the whole world changed for good.

The pandemic changed everyone’s lives. Contrary to most people’s experience, the world shutting down was actually well-timed for me. I had already settled into life at UCI. I was still taking classes, and I wasn’t expected to start research full-time until June. When the school closed indefinitely, I had been starting to feel homesick anyway, so I was happy to go home for three months and take my last quarter of classes remotely (though I didn’t know it would be three months at the time). In June, just as I was finishing classes, the campus partially reopened to allow researchers to come back into their labs. This was also well-timed for me because I was originally expected to start working in the lab full time that month anyway. I got to ease into working in the lab full time; for several months we had to work in shifts. This forced me to have shorter workdays and allowed me to adopt a cat. It was a relatively satisfying schedule for me.

All in all, the pandemic hadn’t fucked up my life too much. I hadn’t missed out on any of college or my break before grad school. I didn’t have to start grad school in a pandemic or defer a year. I didn’t have kids. I still had a source of income. I was definitely doing better than most people in 2020. I even started dating a guy at that summer. Between him and my cat and my friends I had solid support. Overall, 2020 was not a bad year for me.

Then, slowly, things began to deteriorate.

This was not all because of the pandemic, honestly, I couldn’t tell you exactly how much of my downward spiral was pandemic-related as opposed to other factors in my life. What I can tell you is that the pandemic hindered my ability to develop a social life/support system in California. It hindered my ability to get used to life in a state and at a school I had only visited once before moving there. It left me lonely a lot. Being back on campus was nice, it got me out of my apartment every day, but it still felt as if the world had fallen dormant.

So, I jumped into researching. I worked and hung out with my cat and my boyfriend and the couple of friends I had in the state, my “quarantine crew.” I did my best to stay active and keep myself entertained in my free time. I went on hikes and played a lot of Pokémon Sword. Honestly, I couldn’t tell you all that much about how grad school for me in the pandemic is different from before because I didn’t really get to experience much of “before.” I can tell you that we had to suddenly and quickly adapt laboratory courses to a virtual format and then teach them, hoping that students would still benefit from taking the class. I can tell you that we were limited in the hours we could work for a while in order to keep to safety guidelines which hindered research progress. I can tell you that I didn’t really get the chance to know most of the chemistry department outside of my cohort and my lab and that I still haven’t, two years later.

Everything moving to a virtual format had its pros and cons. A world already so internet-centered somehow became even more so. I’d say gathering virtually was more convenient for everyone, it usually took less time than an in-person meeting would. It increased long-distance interactions and allowed for the evolution of “the workplace.” It also pulled us further away from physical human interaction. Developing strong relationships is harder virtually (though some reality shows may suggest otherwise). This means networking is harder, connecting with your coworkers and your teachers and your students is harder.

At this point, I don’t feel like the pandemic has significantly hindered my academic progress. I got to take my advancement exam virtually which really felt like a plus to me. I’ve been working in the lab full-time for a while, I have an undergraduate research assistant, all the undergrads are back on campus. Life has begun to move forward again — for now. I don’t think anyone disagrees that this pandemic has changed the world forever, but what is here to stay and what is just temporary? Will I finally get to know the people in my department? Will I be able to finish in 5 (or so) years? Stay tuned to find out…