Those who respond to 2 month old posts are the ones who really need to calm down.
Pablo Wegesend

I didn’t realize that your post was two months old. I had just read the essay and subsequent comments so it was all new to me. I’m not at all sure how the age of your comment has anything to do with anything.

You’re very presumptuous. That was obvious with your Confederate flag comment and it’s been confirmed in your response to me. You’re assuming that this woman (the author) is insecure about her ethnicity.

Yes, I MIGHT respond with “I’m thick-skinned, nothing bothers me” but that’s not the case. The bulk of your response to me was based on an assumption. Of COURSE certain things bother me and if I’d witnessed the encounter the author had I would have had no problem telling the guy that he was out of line. However, I don’t think the author would have needed my help in that situation. She was with her fella and as she said, the guy backpeddled in order to justify his comment. This does not excuse the comment but it is a reflection of how non-threatening the situation actually was. I take things on a case-by-case basis. Some people cry RACISM!HATE!every chance they get. I would be just as passionate as you seem to be if someone was truly being harrassed.

But back to your assumptions about me. I’m definitely thicker-skinned than I used to be and thank Goddess for that. That doesn’t mean that I’m less sensitive to the suffering of others, it means that I’ve learned not to take the opinions of strangers personally and you know what? That is a beautiful, life-changing lesson that I wish everyone would learn. Think about it: if “victims” reacted differently or even not at all to the comments of bullies/ignorant people a lot would change. Much of the thrill for these folks is the reaction they get.

Pablo, I’m going to share the most valuable lesson I’ve learned. The only behavior you can truly control is your own. I’m not saying that people shouldn’t fight for change but on a day to day basis, during isolated incidences such as the one the author described, it’s good to be equipped with a certain degree of “I can’t care about what this person thinks”.

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