The woman of my dreams

Going by my current trajectory, having a woman in my life itself would be an achievement. But, I am an eternal optimist, more often than not.

As per societal standards, especially Marwari norms, I am in an age bracket which calls for marriage and I completely disagree and even if I don’t; my father in law would never make peace with my bank balance. I feel extremely distant from even the thought of marriage and here in my social neighborhood, it’s just the opposite. It’s overwhelming to see so many of my friends and cousins getting hitched. A kid’s section would certainly be a top priority on my wedding planner’s list. And thanks to my married friends and cousins, my mom who is generally non-competitive is just the opposite these days.

I can never really speak for someone else’s decision but on the outside, it honestly seems like a milestone achieved too fast. All said and done, at the end of it, I only wish them peace, love, jolly nights and lots of beautiful children.

I have often attempted to enquire about reasons to get married and the answer has been a deadpan silence. I really don’t know. I proudly admit wanting to raise children and that’s probably why I would ever get married. Leaving that out, I am yet to find a compelling answer.

I often ramble about my problems in life and my mother has a universal solution to them all and i.e. MARRIAGE. Why? How? No answer but it is most definitely ‘the solution’ to every single problem, question, occasion, etc.

I often feel like I am yet to meet really inspiring couples who have spent a decade or more with each other, couples who would inspire the confidence in me to take the plunge but that has never been the case. Or maybe films coupled with my inexperience have really distorted my imagination, expectation, and understanding. It all seems overrated and delusional at times.

I freak out thinking about my friends who’ve been on the threshold of multiple relationships right before they were about to get married. It’s such a jump, right? How do I expect such a friend to completely turn around and spend a lifetime with one partner while his previous actions clearly implied “Monogamy is not for humans”.

Personally, I just don’t feel ready. Will I ever feel ready? Maybe not. But till then, I owe myself one thing and that is to sincerely inquire about the kind of person I’d like to spend my remaining years with, should I choose to get married. It’s a choice and I want to make it consciously and not let some pangs of infatuation override my rationale. Will it guarantee a lasting and fulfilling marriage? Certainly not. But that shouldn’t undermine my wish list!

I present to you the woman of my dreams.

Someone who exhibits the elegance and grace of an air hostess.

Someone who is rooted in spirituality & Indian culture.

I firmly believe that there is more to life than our transactional pursuits. The road is long and I have miles to go but I do know that this is the path I need to take. It’s imperative to have a partner that thinks and believes likewise. And together we shall travel the road less traveled.

Someone who loves the club as much as the temple. I love both.

Someone who anticipates motherhood and considers parenting a serious & conscious responsibility. Of course, I consider it my responsibility too.

Someone who is ambitious & professionally inclined but not the expense of her own well-being and least, not her family.

The larger point being, we often let ambition take the better of us, only to realize much later that we left out on things that should have mattered much more such as health, family etc.

Someone who glides on the dance floor and cherishes my dancing dyslexia.

Someone who is fitness conscious. #CoupleWorkout

Someone who is adventurous in spirit and is passionate to explore life, beyond southeast Asia and do things that are outside of what society labels as a safe domain.

Someone who is open to raw adrenaline. I would love to do a tandem couple skydive or a couple bungee jump.

Someone who is incredibly feminine and has all the lovely traits that accompany a woman. Stereotype? Yes. I really don’t want a man in a woman’s body.

Women are beautiful inside and out. With regards to the above, someone who gives me a chance to pamper her, to put her on a pedestal, cuddle her, someone who asks me to evaluate her dress, insists on taking me along for shopping, someone who seeks solace in my hug and allows me to console her.

I must confess about a few experiences in life when I’ve had to console or cheer up a woman. I regard those experiences as very special because somewhere they evoke a very tender and compassionate side of you. I wish my dad gave me a younger sister than a younger brother; life would be a lot different and so would my dad.

Cheering up a man, on the other hand, is a lot different and quite boring. But at the same time, I really don’t want to end up with someone who loves to brood.

Someone who enjoys the different shades and seasons of life. Someone who celebrates the monsoon as much as she celebrates the summer/winter.

Sooner than later in my life, I am going to have a dog as a pet. I just know it and so does the universe. It’s an inevitable truth. And hence. . .

Someone who is a dog lover, animal lover, and a vegetarian (Debates for later!) & Someone who loves me as selflessly and unabashedly as a dog.

Someone who isn’t afraid or too conscious to give me a peck in public. Why contain your love in 4 walls? But when the hormones are really building up, I prefer the walls!

Someone who is ready to let her hair down.

Someone who celebrates her adulthood as much as the child within her.

Someone is who deeper than skin and loves to discuss more of ideas, opportunities and ways to redefine our lives and lives of other people. I wouldn’t mind gossip occasionally!

I mean constructive criticism!

Someone who is extremely organized and systematic.

Someone who gets along with my family like her very own.

This can go on but I seemed to have summed it up well. Now that you have read this, you are fully prepared to recommend me to some of your friends. Thank you. Mission accomplished.

This may seem like a really ideal and sort of a fantasy list; the fact that I have never dated is probably why I could write such a list, haha.

On a concluding note, this list is largely about ME but quintessentially love is about the other one, it’s about putting the other one before you. There is nothing wrong with having expectations but holding on them and expecting the outcome of any relation only from your standpoint, is wrong.

I hope I live up to this and If I do miss the mark, I better make sure that my spouse does not read this!

This is simply a wish list, a list that we subconsciously work on, all the time and in all areas of our life; work, education etc. I just it brought it out from my sub-conscious! Do away with your bio-data and make a wish list now.

If you feel you are the one, then do reach out to me!