I read an article by Jenni S on PTSD and these were my thoughts. Her article https://twloha.com/blog/lets-stop-missing-ptsd/
Please read it and either share or think about what you have just read. It resonated with me deeply.
That was so beautiful I won’t lie, I cried. I understand the description and the emotion and the thinking. It is like running, and running, and running. Hoping that those particular memory’s will stay away if I keep running. Though instead I act out in anger or fear because I have yet to get 100% help of what I’m running from. In the end your running from yourself and it’s quite hard and well impossible to run away fully from yourself. Everything is still there, in your heart, your brain, your words, your thoughts, your fears, your emotions, your anger, and your tears. It’s like I can only run so far before all of the above happens and then I think “ok let’s run further, let’s not feel like this again, maybe I just need to keep going and ignore what I don’t want to face; the truth”