Making Joy Your Top Survival Skill,

Strategies For Living Well In Our Dystopian World

Many of us think we are f — — — — . That hope is redundant , a fantasy that is clung too by the ignorant.

So how do you sustain yourselve in a world that is constantly breaking your heart ?

Recent Lessons in Resilience

She sat perched on the edge of the chair , like a delicate bird. So beautiful, with clear skin and crystal blue eyes . Then she talked about being diagnosed with stage 4 cancer at 23 . She is still here 14 years later , what a miracle .

All I could see in her was the triumph of choosing life. One that is purposeful and joyful . Despite all the pain suffering and distress which must also be there.

Someone said she was an “Out Rider” , someone who was living proof that you could survive against the medical odds. She gave people , especially women with Breast Cancer hope.

I am sure Kris Hallenja is inspirational, with her presence , book “Glittering a Turd” and the charity Coppafeel she created. But all that must also put additional pressure on her.

What I saw in her was intense and fundemental joy in the process of living. She was not sitting around hoping , she was in a full embrace with the preciousness of life .

Over supper Kris showed us an app she liked called WeCroak .

This is the message I got when I looked it up …

“One must live as if it could be forever and if one might die each moment. Always both at once “. Mary Renault

It’s a truism that those in touch with their own mortality have a intensity and gratitude for as my husband would say…”another day above ground”.

Gallows humour, is the ability to hold stark realities and still find reason to laugh.

Resilient Women

I was on a “retreat “ , meeting some amazing resilient women, but this was the experience that really stood out .

During our brief time together Kris chatted warmly to everyone , laughed often and just joined in. Including the wild swimming , walking and yoga , even though we all knew she was going through a “bad patch”.

I glanced and saw her fragile , beautiful and scarred body, when changing for the swim. Kris made no attempt to hide or cover up , her courage was outrageous.

Joy is Saying Yes to life

Even if it’s hard to find and might be minuscule.

My joys are small , watching the bees on the lavender , a cup of tea, a telephone call or unexpected laughter.

To choose joy is to say YES to life. It is the best antidote to fear and anxiety.

“Choose Joy …Choose it like a child chooses the shoe to put on the right foot or the crayon to paint the sky. Choose it at first consciously ,effortfully pressing against the weight of the world heavy with reasons for sorrow, restless with the need for action. Feel the sorrow , take the action, but keep pressing the weight of joy against it all, until it becomes automated , like gravity pulling the the stream down its course”. From Maria P’s wonderful Brain pickings

Skills for A Future Worth Living

The future has and always will be uncertain for each of us. How you live the time allotted to you , must not be left to chance.

We all need to raise our self management or at this stage survival skills. Making, seeking and finding joy is more important than any top morning routine.

Daily and Nightly Skills Practice

The last thing I do before sleep is rewind the day, thinking about all I am grateful for and what has brought me joy.

Being joyful is a skill, a practice that needs to get into your proverbial “muscle . As a daily endeavour it can be challenging , even impossible. Learnt wisdom has shown me the more I practice the easier it gets and my capacity for joy just keeps on increasing.

After all, what is the point of surviving in a world without beauty and joy ?