How To Fuck With Your Friends Part 1
I think I was born to do just this.
Jul 24, 2017 · 2 min read

Here are some brilliant ways off the top of my head.
- Blunt out pencils as soon as someone sharpens them to a nice sharp point.
2B or not 2B, that is the question. - If you’re sexting someone, in every steamy message make sure to use perfect grammar with a full stop and end each sentence with a smiley.
After a considerable amount of time, once they’re comfortably nestled in the exchange of bodily fluids and words on a screen — throw in a typo. - While making Maggi or any other instant noodles, put masala in the kadai first… then the water.
- Reset their car’s kilometre count for no reason at all.
Ain’t nothing like fresh beginnings after covering 42,000kms. - If you have the opportunity, tag your friends in memes on Facebook… using their middle name only.
- Fuck up the alignment in a perfect list by not leaving a gap between entries just like this.
- Jack up the volume of your phone ringer to the maximum and set your ringtone to the sound of scratching a chalk board.
Call yourself using someone else’s phone. Often.
7. Repeat numbers on a list, mess up the automatic numbering system and submit.
8. Disable their chrome adblock extension and delete it.
9. Wouldn’t affect the fans but would infuriate your friends who hate it — secretly add pineapple as toppings on every pizza that’s ordered to a house party.
10. Crack an egg using one hand and fluidly pour the contents into a beating cup really slow… then drop a piece of the shell in.
