I Can't Wait To Tax Michael Bloomberg

Steven Coffin
Nov 8 · 3 min read

A new foe has appeared in the Democratic Primary Race: Michael Bloomberg. Yes, that is right, one of the richest people in America has decided that he has what it takes to inspire the working class to destroy Donald Trump in the election. Bloomberg doesn’t believe that the current Democratic Primary has a candidate that will be able to defeat Trump, despite a ton of polls saying that every top Democratic candidate beats him in the election. So let’s be honest, Michael Bloomberg is scared and doesn’t want Bernie Sanders or Elizabeth Warren to heavily tax him, which is going to make it so much better when he is heavily taxed.

Oh no! I am getting taxed!

Hearing the news of his run made me disappointed because this primary does not need any more candidates, but then I got excited. Bloomberg, with a net worth of 52 billion dollars, wants to join the race and possibly take the support of moderate candidates such as Joe Biden and Pete Buttigieg, and, like Tom Steyer’s controversial run, will show America that billionaires should not exist. The more billionaires that can show America that they are the worst, the better.

Billionaires sit on thrones made by the blood, sweat, and tears of the working class, and it is time that we make them get off of the thrones that belong to us. It is time that we come together as a nation and throw the rich out of politics. We don’t need a billionaire president, and we surely don’t need a candidate that accepts their money! We need a drastic change in America and there is no possible way we will get that from billionaires or candidates like Joe Biden who accepts money from billionaires and corporate lobbyists.

Tom Steyer, with a 1.6 billion dollar net worth, had his aides use his money to attempt to buy endorsements and his aide stole Kamala Harris’ volunteer data. This is just one of the plenty of examples of why billionaires will not lead the country in the right direction, and why taxing them to make America a better place is mandatory. Michael Bloomberg has also showcased the ability to be a garbage human being by supporting stop-and-frisk and being against Medicare For All as well as, not surprisingly, wealth taxes.

To Bloomberg, it is fine that 45,000 people die every year due to lack of health care, it is fine that three people own more wealth than the bottom 50% of the country, and it is fine that police use a program widely known for racial profiling, but God forbid someone touches his wealth. It is time that changes. It is time we throw out beliefs like Bloomberg’s and tax the hell out of him. It is time that billionaires stop existing.

That is exactly what the future will bring. Bernie Sanders is just the start of the revolution. If the working class doesn’t get Bernie Sanders. If the rich, like Bloomberg, stands in the way of what we want, then you better be prepared for what comes after Bernie Sanders. Bernie’s wealth tax is generous. Bernie’s wealth tax is a start, but if Bloomberg doesn’t see billions of his dollars disappear during the next presidency, then we are going to reach a point where the working class will elect someone with even more radical ideas. The time is up for middle ground, rich-loving candidates. We are tired of suffering and we would love to see billionaires lose all of the wealth they have created by making our lives worse, and that is exactly what we are going to see. I can’t wait for these terrible billionaires to finally contribute to society in a meaningful way by sacrificing their extreme wealth to fund plans that will improve the lives of everyone in this country. We are going to elect someone who will do this. We are going to elect Bernie Sanders and we are going to tax the rich! I can’t wait to tax Michael Bloomberg.

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