Do you have any data to back up the first 24 words in your opening sentence? Particularly the phrase “most peoples minds”. Your premise is beyond rubbery.
Good sex takes place in the mind. Good sex takes place with a good partner. Now that we know what’s going through your mind, a come-hither glance from a mind like yours would leave a many a man’s mind limp with disinterest.
Nobody “owes” you an orgasm but thyself. We all need to stand tall and take some responsibility for our own contribution to bad sex. It takes TWO to NOT communicate.
Every instance you cite can be otherwise defined as “a relationship devoid of honest communication”. And you cannot hap-hazardly foist that onto men (unless you are close-minded). Any decent heterosexual man who knows and values his and his partner’s sexuality will abide by the Sexual Golden Rule: “Women come first”. If that is not happening in a woman’s life, then it is time to look inward. If a woman repeatedly chooses men who have been educated at the University of PornoTopia… chances are slim they will be sexually fulfilled.
My question to you and every woman you spoke to in researching your article is:
Who is choosing these hapless men?