HerLowEndTheory, Ch. 7: Fighting Back vs. Walking Away.

I don’t like this feeling. Like I “allowed” some form of discrimination to take place by choosing not to insert myself into the situation. That by my lack of willingness to participate, I had passively condoned it.

Does that make sense?

This morning I encountered a form of racism or discrimination (or both?), and it sucked. Not because this was my first exposure to this sort of attitude — because let’s be honest, I’m black, African, a woman…the odds are kinda against me here — but because due to my distraction (I was incredibly tired, late to work, it was storming outside blah blah), I walked away from the situation and didn’t address it. I don’t think it’s important to discuss what “it” was in detail — discrimination is discrimination is discrimination. It exists, it’s everywhere, and we all know it. Instead, what was difficult for me to wrap my mind around was that by walking away, had I somehow allowed this act to continue? Would it have made that much difference if I had said something? Do I always need to make a scene? Are we ever allowed to take our activist hat off? I’m a strong believer in using your access to an audience to address real life shit — but how do you measure the impact that it actually has?

It’s pissing me off now that I didn’t address it. That I somehow let myself down. Somehow allowed a situation to take my power away. Disempowerment…scary. But, it’s also sooo overwhelming that there are so many issues, causes, to address and think about and be vocal about.

Is it merely a case of “picking your battles”? How do you find a balance between fighting back and walking away?